Jeff: The single most hip individual in the Universe. He is incredibly beautiful, speaks 23 languages, and plays every musical instrument ever invented. He is loved by all that meet him and in fact the Grateful Dead actually followed Jeff across the country for over 15 years. Women can not be in his presence for more than 20 minutes because of dehydration risk. This is due to the spontaneous orgasms they experience upon laying their eyes on him. Jeff is also the kindest person in the Universe and once kissed a sloth which later turned it into Taylor Swift.
Jeff only speaks to beautiful women. If you find yourself in the presence of Jeff you should first give the 2 finger peace sign salute in greeting. Jeff will then bless you by granting 3 wishes. Aftweward, Jeff will fly you to his bungalow on the dark side of the moon and make mad passionate love to you for a minimum of 14 hours. At which point he will stop and make you breakfast. All your former friends will hate you for the perfection you have then become.
Jeff only speaks to beautiful women. If you find yourself in the presence of Jeff you should first give the 2 finger peace sign salute in greeting. Jeff will then bless you by granting 3 wishes. Aftweward, Jeff will fly you to his bungalow on the dark side of the moon and make mad passionate love to you for a minimum of 14 hours. At which point he will stop and make you breakfast. All your former friends will hate you for the perfection you have then become.
by Pangean February 8, 2017
Get the Jeff mug.A fucking hilarious comedian from Australia. He's like the Rosa Parks but for the word Cunt, and like rosa parks he wants to get shot by rednecks. He's got a fucking banging hot girlfriend Kate Luyben, a young son, four comedy specials (2 w/ netflix), and a show called legit, as well as a death wish by being an Aussie very much involved in American Politics.
Joke 1
Jim Jefferies: Well in America people get my accent confused with the brits, but sometimes with SouthAfrican. I got to say the Australian accent and the South African accent aren't that different if I'm honest. The difference is... Close your eyes and picture me: punching a black person.
Audience:*laughs/gasps
Jim: What I'm trying to say South Africans are horrible people.
Jim Jefferies: Well in America people get my accent confused with the brits, but sometimes with SouthAfrican. I got to say the Australian accent and the South African accent aren't that different if I'm honest. The difference is... Close your eyes and picture me: punching a black person.
Audience:*laughs/gasps
Jim: What I'm trying to say South Africans are horrible people.
by lard789 March 27, 2017
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Jeff Lewis, star of Bravo TV's "Flipping Out" is a pompous selfish nasty gay middle aged man. He almost always hires young attract gay eye candy for his pleasure, but is completely ok with firing them for any reason possible. He feels that he is ALWAYS right when it comes to his slave-like employees and clients who question him. His face, and most notably, his lips, are full of botox.. The only reason why his assistant, Jenni, has been working with him for over 10 years, is because she has succumbed to believe that Jeff Lewis is her master, and that she must obey. See: egotistical bastard.
Gay guy 1: OMG Felipe! I was watching Bravo today and saw Jeff Lewis firing one hot piece of ass. I think his name was Trace.
Gay guy 2: Felipe, my love, Jeff Lewis fired that guy for taking time out of work to create a design of a closet for himself. Jeff could've just warned him and let him stay. But no, to Jeff, every employee is as disposable as the condoms he uses to screw his other employees with.
Gay guy 1: Ooh snap! You went there.
Gay guy 2: Felipe, my love, Jeff Lewis fired that guy for taking time out of work to create a design of a closet for himself. Jeff could've just warned him and let him stay. But no, to Jeff, every employee is as disposable as the condoms he uses to screw his other employees with.
Gay guy 1: Ooh snap! You went there.
by fiftyandnifty August 17, 2011
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Get the Dirty jeff mug.A nicer version of the dorms. This is where students go expecting more freedom from the dorms, only to be disappointed by a security force, second only to the KGB in fairness and Homer Simpson in intelligence. More rules here than at Grandma's house, except Grandma treated you more like an adult when you were 5 than the staff treats you now. More Ghetto people per square mile here than anywhere in Sactown.
Jefferson Commons Apartments are the worst ever.
Hey, I like to be treated like I'm 10 years old, I should move to Jefferson Commons.
Hey, I like to be treated like I'm 10 years old, I should move to Jefferson Commons.
by Dick Nizzle March 7, 2005
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