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John Mayer

IfyouwouldveblinkedthenIwouldveLookedawayatthefirstglanceIfyoutastedpoisonyoucouldveSpitmeoutatthefirstchanceIfIwassomepaintdiditsplattrOnapromisinggrownmanAndifIwasachilddiditmatterIfyougottowashyourhandsohAllIusetodowasprayWouldvecouldveshouldveIfyoudneverlookdmywayIwouldvestayedonmykneesAndIdamnsureneverwouldvedancedwiththedevilAtnineteenAndtheGodshonesttruthisthatthepainwasheavenAndnowthatImgrownImscaredofghostsMemoriesfeellikeweaponsAndnowthatiknowIwishyoudleftmewonderingIfyounevertouchedmeiwouldveGonealongwiththerighteousifIneverblushedthentheycouldveNeverwhisperedaboutthisAndifyouneversavedmefromboredomicouldveoneonasIwasButLordyoumademefeelimprantAndthenyoutriedtoeraseusohYoureacrisisofmyfaithWouldvecouldveshouldveIfIdonlyplayeditsafeIwouldvestayedonmykneesAndIdamnsureneverwouldvedancedwiththedevil…GodrestmysoulimisswhoIusedtobeThetombwontclosestainedglasswindowsinmymindIregretyouallthetimeIcantletthisgoIfightwithyouinmysleepThewoundwontcloseIkeeponwaitingforasignIregretyouallthetimeIfclaritysindeaththenwhywontthisdieYearsoftearingdownourbannersyouandLivingforthethrillofhittingyouwhereithurtsGivemebackmygirlhooditwasminefirst..IcantletthisgoIfightwithyouinmysleepThewoundwontcloseIkeeponwaitingforasignIregretyouallthetimeOhGodrestmysoulImisswhoIusedtobeThetombwontclosestainedglasswindowsinmymindIregretyouallthetimeIcantletthisgoIfightwithyouinmysleepThewoundwontcloseIkeeponwaitingforasignIregretyouallthetime
john mayer: dickhead who can’t date woman his age
by 19stooyoungtobemessedwith June 25, 2023
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John

John is the most perfect guy you’ll ever meet. He’s smart, good-looking, and most of all the sweetest.
Pls marry me john!!
by Beebor 1 June 30, 2022
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John Teacher

A bulky man who loves green, and talks about his cats nonstop. His main students are Claire and Sarah. Goes on his phone while he gives us 91876 assignments to do in 45 minutes.
"Complete the 91876 assignments in 45 minutes, or it becomes homework!" John Teacher screeched, in his raspy voice
by Milkis Official September 29, 2020
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john

random normal guy that works at some company you have no idea exists
guy 1: *working*
john: *walks up* my shift is done
guy 1: ok?
by Stupid Af July 12, 2021
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Johned

When a “friend” ignores your messages either on purpose or just ignorance.
Brad got johned by john
by Dangetjohn June 6, 2022
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John

John is a guy who works really hard in what he’s good at like sports and he tried hard in school. He cares a lot for people and if ur important to him in his life he will make time for you. He’s a goofy blonde headed guy who is east to fall for, he may have some secrets of his and feel down sometimes but really all he needs is to open up to someone even if it’s hard sometimes. He has kinda of strict parents and it can get in the way of him having fun sometimes. He gets all the girls because he’s so flirty and leaves girls wondering “I wonder when he’s gonna text back next.” He will shoot his shot but he expects the same energy back. He is super considerate and is interested in what u say and is really ideal boyfriend material. He’s ur typical teenage boy but on the inside it’s something u don’t wanna miss. HE ALSO HAS SOME NICE ABS GEEZ.
Me: “im no simp, but John just changes that.”
by Gabbyhaha January 11, 2021
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The John Wilkinson Bowl Challenge

The John Wilkinson Bowl Challenge Consists Of: A Bowl Filled With One Gram Of Indica Like Purp, Some Keef (enough to cover the top and cigarette tobacco, enough to cover middle of the bowl. You Pack it, Light it and In Order To Successfully Complete The John Wilkinson Bowl Challenge You Have To Clear The Whole Bowl In One Hit and Exhale A Haze Of Smoke Thick Enough To Cover Your Surrounding Enviorment, Like Your Face.
Person 1: John Smoked A Whole Bowl Of 1 Gram Of Weed, Keef, And Tobacco yet some how manage to clear it in ONE HIT!
Person 2: Thats crazy! The John Wilkinson Bowl Challenge FTW!
by SirSource August 5, 2020
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