Flaming handjob

Recieving a handjob while you have Chlamydia

Brady: "How was last night with Leah?"
Alex: "It was great, but the flaming handjob she gave me hurt life a mfer."
Brady: "It's ashame I gave you chlamydia."
Alex: "Yeah."

by FedsGay69 August 17, 2019

Bronx Handjob

Punching someone in the dick, quickly and repeatedly

Lucas introducing metachlorians to explain The Force pissed us off so much we held him down and gave him a Bronx Handjob

by UnexpectedBacon November 10, 2024

Halliburton Handjob

The act of jerking someone off to distract them from the Alaskan Pipeline that’s about to be shoved up their ass.

Most frequently employed by DC lobbyists on various segments of the American public and by Amber Heard on unsuspecting romantic partners.

1. Dazzled by the company’s offer of thousands of good-paying factory jobs in exchange for tax cuts and reduced regulations, the city council was once again fooled by the old Halliburton Handjob.

2. After hearing of her boyfriend Brodie’s infidelity, Justine organized a gangbang and ambushed Brodie with a Halliburton Handjob in front of all his friends.

by Call Me Ahab January 20, 2024

Harambe handjob

A handjob given by someone with extremely firm grip

Damn I’m sore he/she gave me that harambe handjob last night, thought they were going to rip my dick off.

by Steve Erwin February 9, 2024

Taiwanese Handjob Technique

A sexual technique including a reverse grip on the penis and a little bit of feet. The feet are used for ballsack stabilization. A chopstick can be used to sound the urethra if desired.

That Asian chick used the Taiwanese Handjob Technique behind the fish market yesterday and I blew a hot load all over her hand.

by Hshsjshshsj May 15, 2025

Hilo Handjob

When you carve out the inside of a block of Spam and use it as a makeshift Fleshlight. Post-coitus, served cold with a slice of pineapple and a Steinlager.

I went home and treated myself to a Hilo Handjob last night.

by Flailure Jimbob September 13, 2022

Michigan Handjob

When someone gives you a handjob with mittens on.

It was so fkn cold outside, Suzy had to give him a Michigan handjob so she could stay warm.

by Mommymilker1000 May 3, 2022