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Shaving the Beard

When a heterosexual woman divorces her gay husband.
After 30 years of unknowingly acting as Bruce's beard, Cindy finally divorced him after he got caught red-handed at the gay bar.

Bruce: I'm sorry I didn't tell you that I was gay when we got married. Will you stay married to me and pretend that we have sex?

Cindy: I think it's time you came out of the closet - I'm shaving the beard!
by Steve Fraser September 21, 2011
mugGet the Shaving the Beardmug.

beard second

The unit of distance. The length the average beard grows in one second.
That race was like 4 billion beard seconds!
by Thinkingray May 16, 2014
mugGet the beard secondmug.

Bearded Stranger

When a woman sits reverse cowgirl style on the face of a bearded man, making it impossible to see anything but his beard. His nose may or may not end up in her butthole.
I had fun being her bearded stranger last night.
by bkmon3y April 30, 2014
mugGet the Bearded Strangermug.

Satan's Beard

The pubic hair of a redhead female full bush in the shape of a triangle. Resembles a goatee of witch would be expected to be seen on Satan's chin.
"That redhead girl dropped her panties and I caught a glimpse of Satan's Beard"
by Jack369 June 29, 2014
mugGet the Satan's Beardmug.

Ass Beard

A hairy butt crack. When someone bends over and their butt crack is showing with massive amounts of hair.
by Spiffy McGee February 19, 2009
mugGet the Ass Beardmug.

Bum Beard

The hair growing on the cheeks of your ass, around your ring.
My bum beards so long I could dreadlock it

I shaved my balls, gooch and bum beard last night
by Rob_uk April 28, 2006
mugGet the Bum Beardmug.

Beard Rub

Beard rub: A formal greeting or display of manly solidarity between two or more bearded men.

Can also be called a scruff hug, or a beard-bump. Commonly used for novelty, or to show that you, as a bearded man, are not fucking around. Beards are highly dangerous and anyone who attempts to use and/or get near one risks serious injury and/or death. Beard at your own risk.
Beard Rub happens when 2 or more suitably bearded men meet up and rub face.
by Meowtehh April 16, 2013
mugGet the Beard Rubmug.

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