tainted berserker

A relative of the dingleberry, the tainted berserker is a fierce fleck of fecal matter that has invaded upon the grundle region (tainted) as a result of a particularly violent, berserker-style bowel movement.

Strauss invoked the power of Odin upon the porcelain throne of Assgard, thus requiring copious amounts of toilet paper to ensure that no tainted berserkers were creeping up on his family jewels.

by Caible October 10, 2013

Taint Piece

The taint, or commonly known as the gooch. As the saying goes, "It taint ass and it taint balls!"

John was acting like a fool, so I kicked him in the taint piece.

by kill21345 May 16, 2009

taint fracking

When you have intercourse with a woman by using your penis to drill a hole in between her vagina and anus.

I was so tired of plain old anal with her, so we explored some untapped taint fracking opportunities.

by Phil Nagi November 23, 2016

Taint Splitter

When you drop a turd that’s so hard, so long and so girthy you feel like your taint is being slowly split in half as the behemoth passes.

From the moans coming from the stall next to mine, I’m pretty that guy was forcing out a taint splitter.

Hey braaaaaahhh I’m really hurting. I just has a taint splitter. Will you do a brooohhh a solid and take a gander at my taint and make sure it’s not bleeding?

I’m going to have to take a laxative. I can’t take anymore taint splitters.

by Eaton Holgoode October 16, 2018

taint wad

The rolled up kleenex that a man will stuff between your butt checks to soak up the sweat during the heat of the summer.

It was a hot humid steaming day and John was concerned that his taint wad was slipping from his crack!!

by SugarCube May 23, 2013

lip taint

The ditch-like trough between the columella of the nose and the middle of the upper lip. Anatomically known as the philtrum.

Johnny's mustache will not grow in his lip taint.

by seerowdy January 10, 2014

taint dial

when shitting in a public restroom, one may be afraid to rest your phone on a strange surface. the only other option is to rest it in your underwear as a safety net. depending on how the long the wipe takes, one may forget to remove the phone. once the pants are pulled up and snug, you may dial the phone with your taint

Damien: "i was on the toilet so long the other night, i forgot i rested a mean game of angry birds on my drawers. wouldn't you know when all was said and done, i taint dialed my mom. plus, the phone smelled like burnt tacos for a week."

butt dial
pocket dial

by luvitwenucallmebigpasta July 17, 2012