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You Absolute Soggy Flannel

1: Used generally to call someone an idiot or a bit stupid

2: If you say "you have the personality of a soggy flannel" basically means youre dry asf and you need to have a bit more personality babes xox
1: Youre so bad at obbys, you absolute soggy flannel

2: I was talking to him last night and honest to god he was like a soggy flannel
by CalpolInhaler June 4, 2023
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Absolute Unit

The absolute definition of a chonker.
An absolute unit = a gigachad of immaculate form.
Goncalos are natural born absolute units.
Goncalo: I'm an ABSOLUTE UNIT
The rest of the lads: yeah whatever...
by Le Handle May 10, 2021
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absolute gibberish

absolute gibberish to the point where you can't understand shit.
person 1: "fkijdhkfiusdfgdisfudsl"
person 2: tf

person 3: its absolute gibberish
by -ASUTE- September 14, 2022
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Absolute Unit

A very large, obese cat.

In order for a fat cat to be considered an absolute unit, it must NOT be of a breed that is naturally very large in size (ex. a Maine Coon).

An orange cat that weighs 25 lbs = Absolute Unit

A Maine Coon that weighs 25 lbs = NOT an Absolute Unit
My cat Steve is an absolute unit.
by Ubeenbamboozledson April 5, 2022
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Absolute peckhead

Someone who has a skinny frame with ginger hair.
Person 1: fuck off lad I'll stab ya
Person 2 : oh Ben mate stop being an absolute peckhead
by Jimmy savie September 5, 2021
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Absolutely Killed it, This is Dead

When someone does absolutely ass on something (“Absolutely Killed it means you did well but adding “This is Dead” with it means that you did bad)
by ndotty_gzzzz March 9, 2025
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Absolute convict

A way of mildly offending someone without crossing any homophobic, racist, or inappropriate boundaries, usually meant light heartedly, but sometimes with harsh intent.

Used with the intent of being racist actually, and as a matter of fact, a lot of the time is meant to make someone hate their life, so yeah, have fun you bunch of gay cunts.
Oh has you seen that fucking nigga, he’s an absolute convict, robbing bikes n shit.
by Ryisanonce February 3, 2019
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