Skip to main content

douche

A medical device used by women to lubricate their vagina.

Also it is someone who embodies this device. It is a man (usually) that for some reason gets attention from females despite the fact that he is a jerk to everyone, including the females he gets attention from. Sometimes he may not even know that he is doing it, but most of the time he does and his indifference or assumed indifference is the cause of a level of distaste from his peers, especially other males. He needs not be moronic, attention seeking, or with a self inflated sense of self worth, but most of the time is some combination. He may actually have a good amount of friends, but most of these are women and men who want to be near women. He probably is the subject of mockery behind his back or the subject to bitching about between other males and females in private.
That guy, mike, is such a douche. Why do people even like him?

My vag is so dry.
Girl, you should buy a douche.
by drgnslyr0929 October 7, 2012
mugGet the douchemug.

Douche

by Gog huk December 31, 2021
mugGet the Douchemug.

Douche Unit

1. A group of 2 or more people who, when by themselves, would each be individually referred to as douches and or douche bags.

2. An individual who by themselves would be what is called a Super Douche.
My boyfriend and his friends are a total Douche Unit when they hang out.

OMG, the guy that hit on me at the bar was a total DOUCHE UNIT!
by The Mouse they call Mighty November 30, 2011
mugGet the Douche Unitmug.

Douche Canoe

Douche Canoe (noun): A self-absorbed, obnoxious individual who drifts through life on a raft of arrogance, bad takes, and an utter lack of self-awareness. Often mistaken for a human, but upon closer inspection, closely resembles a sentient, poorly groomed toe with an attitude problem because he likely sat on a pinecone.
Example: Kyle, the human embodiment of a stubbed toe, leaned back in his chair, manspreading like he was claiming land, and loudly explaining why everyone else was wrong about literally everything. Between flexing his "elite genetics" (despite looking like a swollen big toe) and hitting on anything that moved, he remained blissfully unaware that the entire room was desperately hoping for a strong gust of wind to carry his douche canoe far, far away.
by Sassenach March 14, 2025
mugGet the Douche Canoemug.

Douche

That douche Obama is making America nigger-rich.
by Deodexidus October 12, 2013
mugGet the Douchemug.

Douche'

dou·ché
do͞oˈSHā/
exclamation: douché

(in fencing) used as an acknowledgment of a hit to one's opponent, who happens to be a douche.
used as an acknowledgment during a discussion of a good or clever point made at one's expense (who happens to be a douche) by another person.
Walking to my car after work this evening. A group of 4 young dudes walks up to the crosswalk the same time I do. As we wait I hear them chatting among themselves. One turns to me and says "nice hair. Did ur mom fuck a smurf?". To which his buddies laugh. Without missing a beat I look at him, smile, and say "nice face. Did ur mom fuck a horse?" His buddies literally double over howling with laughter. "Douche'!!"
by ForgingGraphemes September 9, 2016
mugGet the Douche'mug.

Douche Tools

A mix of tools and douchebags that think they're fuckin hilarious, when they're just completely retarded and obnoxiously loud 24/7
god damn it, travis, ryan, jeremy and all of them, such douche tools!
by Anonymous66888 November 22, 2010
mugGet the Douche Toolsmug.

Share this definition