I don't give two and a half shits

You really, REALLY don't care about what someone just told you.

Brody: Hey, I just found this really funny video I wanna show you, it's about this-

Ryan: I don't GIVE two and a half shits, alright?!

by MCGONN June 18, 2009

I don't even eat pie cuz

Something to say when you ain't tryna do shit with them.

Dan: Ayo Tristan, you trying to got to a movie
Tristan: I don't even eat pie cuz *Walks away*

by ThatGuyHit February 10, 2021

I don't want to ruin our friendship

Phrase used in polite company. Literal translation is "There's no fricking way I am going to have sex with your fat ugly ass." Used in conjunction with the horrendous phrases "You're a nice guy but..." and "It's not you, it's me."

While I appreciate that you've actually taken a bath for the first time since 1983, I just...don't want to ruin our friendship...

by Paul Wartenberg July 11, 2004

I don't know what to tell you

A saying that's used to tell someone nicely that nothing is getting done about something,that they simply don't care or that you're "shit out of luck"

Employee: "We have a lot of work and no time to do it" Boss: "I don't know what to tell you"

by battleaxe June 13, 2017

I Don't Bay Leaf in Magic Burger

A Bob's Burgers burger, flavored with bay leaf

"Hey Bob, what's the burger of the day?" "It's the I Don't Bay Leaf in Magic Burger, you should try it!"

by America Lover 🇺🇸 November 17, 2018

I don't hate the people, just the government.

"I don't hate the people, just the government" is something people say when they want to make prejudiced, often racist, comments about a country and its people based on zero evidence. For some reason that cannot yet be explained, the people who use this line almost always say stuff that would cause others to think they hate the people.

I don't hate the people, just the government. That's why we need to ban the Chinese from coming to our country until they become civi... I mean democratic. We'll call it the Chinese Ex... Anti-Communist Act.

by SeoyeonlovesDan December 21, 2020

I don't care if you're talking to God

Used to state that you do not care about the other person's excuse, no matter how serious it is.

Student: But sir, I was held up because I was giving mouth-to-mouth to someone who had cardiac arrest.

Teacher: I don't care if you're talking to God, detention!

by Shadowassasin13 December 16, 2010