bed mayo

Another word for cum.

Oh no! You got bed mayo all over my hair!

by tablesauce December 31, 2016

kill in bed

To fuck someone so hard they won’t forget it.

Drake: Yo I kill in bed so hard last night.

Leon: Bruh how do you do that?

Drake: You fuck her so hard she won’t forget.

Leon: Aye that’s my boy

by afhsg June 3, 2018

Shit in the bed

Amber Herd

Amber Herd took a shit in the bed, she is a dumb bitch

by Captain_solo192 April 22, 2022

bed puddle

A gathering of cum that forms in the sheets following sex or a really steamy dream. It often leads to sheets being washed or if feeling exceptionally shameful, burned.

Girl: YOU BUTTHOLE, you had me land in a bed puddle!!!
Me: I'll start the fire.

by ShroomBear September 9, 2015

stabbing the bed

When a guy sleeps on his stomach and has a boner, causing said boner to stick into the mattress.

I woke up this morning with my penis hurting, I must have been stabbing the bed all night!

by Jim Throttle September 30, 2017

Bed-Reading

The action of placing a book in your right hand, running full speed at your bed, jumping precisely five feet away from the mattress, completing a one hundred and eighty degree spin while simultaneously crossing the book between your legs. You then land on your back with the book open and proceed to read your story of choice.

Bed-Reading is an extreme sport, only for the elite.

by dirkdiggler12 December 4, 2016

bed mumbler

A person who speaks in a low and poorly articulated voice when sleepy or recently awoken, so that you have to constantly ask them to repeat themselves. Especially refers to people whom you're lying in bed with.

you: So we should do this again sometime babe.
bed mumbler: (incomprehensible rubbish)
you: What?
bed mumbler: (incomprehensible rubbish)
you: Wait, say that again.

by imwithbeardy February 28, 2009