jared schmeck

“Jared Schmeck" is the yellow discharge from the top of a penis infected with an STD.

I fucked this skank at a DMB concert and now I have this smelly Jared Schmeck on my dick.

by EverybodyPanic December 27, 2021

jared kleinman

from the musical dear evan hansen, jared kleinman is the BEST BOY. a sarcastic and sometimes mean asshole but he’s insecure and uses meanness as a defense mechanism. jared is a loyal friend but will sometimes call you an acorn for falling out of a tree and breaking your arm.

“jared kleinman is a bit rude, but i feel like we could be good friends!

by luhduhquhwin October 17, 2021

Jared’s Pose

The peace sign over the individuals face/head area

Did you see that dweeb doing the Jared’s pose? What a loser

by Fat Mano March 31, 2020

hot Jared

When you Saran Wrap your ball sack to your neighbor’s nostrils then hop on your riding lawn mower and drive into town.

I had to hot Jared my coworker because he didn’t do his TCP reports.

by Frumpee September 3, 2022

Jared Syndrome

Jared Syndrome is when someone says they'll be right back, but never returns .

Tony - "Yo, get on Minecraft"
Garry - "Alright, give me a second"
**1 hour passes**
Tony - "Garry has Jared Syndrome"

by xgrabbitz January 26, 2023

Jared Militar

A jararted person. The only word to describe him is "jararted".

Person 1: How's Jared Militar?
Person 2: He's Jararted

by Discorduser717 October 31, 2019

jared lane

An asshole who likes to use girls for their sexual pleasure

Girl 1: he beat me

Girl 2: he raped me😖
Jared Lane: hey I know I am asshole

by Jeff Carousel January 11, 2017