Shits and Johnsons

n.
The two basic types of people in the world. The Shits are self righteous hypocrites that only look out for themselves and desperately crave power, status, praise, and the right to pass judgment on everything they disapprove of.
Johnsons are decent people that generally mind their own business but are always ready to offer help to anyone who needs it without judgment or reservation.

An expression first used by Jack Black in the memoir “You Can’t Win” and later referenced in the novels of William S. Burroughs.

by William Lee January 22, 2004

jacked as shit

When a person thinks that they are really strong with enormous muscles, but in reality they are small.

-Soccer Player: Hey bra, I just maxed out at 140 on bench!

-Football Player: Wow, dude! Ur jacked as shit!

-Soccer Player: I know, right?

by mtnt69 May 8, 2011

Shit Ship

A fictional romantic relationship that is built on lies and drama. Said ship is cringe-inducing. Feels forced and there's no chemistry between the actors

I can't wait until Adam and Jessa break up on Girls. That's a shit ship.

by ceeloodreamer February 13, 2017

knocked in the shit

Simply means beating someone up. Apparently only used in Florida.

"Gimme my fucking money before you get knocked in the shit!"

"You got knocked in your shit! Ha ha!"

by AZZ-KIKR December 28, 2006

shit and run

While the shit and run has always referred to taking a shit in an inappropriate place (usually as a joke) and then high-tailing out of the location, the newest iteration involves taking a shit in a girl's house after you have had a one night stand with her and then leaving the house immediately (flushing the toilet is optional).

Jack: Dude, where were you last night?

Mark: Met a girl at the bar but she was so fucking annoying I had to pull a shit and run.

Jack: Did you flush?

Mark: Hell no!

by Nair December 21, 2010

Chain-Shitting

(n.)- The act of 2 or more people shitting right after each other usually leading one to have to smell the other persons nasty shit fumes because you either:

a. have one bathroom

b. have to take a shit badly

It's origins are found in the word chain-smoking, meaning to smoke cig after cig.

Shitter #1: Ay man, Ima take a shit real quick.

Shitter #2: Fuck hurry up! I gotta wait and now we have to go through chain-shitting. Great!

by SRLthaballa November 6, 2009

happy shit

When someone is taking a shit at work on the clock.

A guy I used to work with told me that he was going take a "happy shit". I asked, " what's that"? And he replied, that's when you are getting paid to shit.

by scottyd62 July 23, 2016