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potato-helping

Attempting to alleviate a situation by being of help, but instead making no impact or making the situation worse.
A: Hey, I remember you talked about that problem with your boyfriend, so I went ahead and asked him about it. He was kinda stand-offish, but I managed to get your point across.

B: You did WHAT? OK, look, I appreciate how much energy you put into that, but you're really potato-helping right now. This is going to make talking to him harder.

A: Oh, I didn't realize. I'm sorry.
by Roselle Corin July 3, 2023
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hobbit helper

A one to two foot ladder to assist on reaching objects to high for a vertically challenged individual.
Can I use the hobbit helper to reach the cupboard because I'm to short
by Gabecali1488 November 16, 2023
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Related Words

homie helper

Someone who is willing to engage in sexual intercourse with a friend in order to help that friend end a long period without intercourse.
Friend 1: “Man, I’m in a serious slump right now. I haven’t gotten laid in almost two years.”
Friend 2: “Call up Jessica, she’s a homie helper. She’s helped a bunch of guys end their dry spells.”
by Fratlock Holmes May 31, 2024
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Not helping

Oh I know your not! Or, wait, who? I'm I supposed to be helping you? What exactly am I supposed to be helping you with, vermin? Is the 2 hour work day too much for you? Does being a piece of shit make it hard for you to scoop yourself into a garbage bag where you belong? Or out of a litter box because you're dogshit?
Hym "I'm not helping? I didn't know I was supposed to help. I thought I just did this thing... And then either die from brainz infection or murder a kids and kill myself. I didn't know I had to help you fucks as I hang half-consumed by the meat grinder that feeds the kids I didn't sire. Did you need my organs too? Because I'm not changing my donor status but I suspect your just going to take the organs anyway. I mean, current trends suggest that you're just going to take the organs anyway. What could you possibly need my help with? A.I.? Already did it. Ridding yourself of delusion? Already did that. Oh! Your kids! You need help ejecting the consciousness from their body! Of course... I was getting around to it but I feel like I would be doing all the work."
by Hym Iam October 3, 2024
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Himalayan Helpdesk

An off-shore, remote technical or other customer service center, usually third-party to the company it serves and located in India or elsewhere in the eastern world, whose agents‘ language barriers and lack of sufficient cultural familiarity make for egregiously poor service.
I explained to the Himalayan helpdesk agent that my brand new Dell laptop exploded when I plugged it in. He responded in a thick eastern accent, "Yes, yes, I see the trouble you are having today Mr. Jake, and I am sorry, but I will be more than happy today to assist with this. Have you tried, first, restarting the computer?"
by ChubbyBen January 8, 2025
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Scottish Helper

Standing across from another man facing each other with your penises side by side, and jerk both of them with one hand.
Brad: “Hey Alex, are you ready to have sex?”
Alex: “Only if we start with a Scottish Helper!”
by Jellyfish beans February 6, 2025
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Meta Helped China With AI

Yeah dawg that is super-treason you can't give that to them... Unless I control all of their electronics now, in which case, there's this cute TikTok girl that sings the Russian song and you motherfuckers need to fork her over immediately! I WILL MURDER YOU ALL!!!
Hym "Meta helped China with AI? Hooooly shit guys! What the fuck Trump!? How about get this new whistleblower some security? Or does she not need it because it's the whistleblowing about stealing from me part that people are getting killed over?"
by Hym Iam April 11, 2025
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