Soft Clarinet

The act of eating out a vagina whilst tickling the recipient’s belly, the music being the resulting mix of moaning and laughter

Gave that bitch a soft clarinet last night, should’ve heard her music

by Lud Hanjeschter February 18, 2026

bass clarinet

Eating a man's ass while giving him a handjob. A rusty clarinet in a "lower register."

My baby plays a mean bass clarinet.

by Bcmusic July 30, 2025

Wichita Clarinet

When you shove both ends of an instrument into two girls pussy's and queef in order to play the instrument. The sound comes out of the girls mouths.

My cousin and m y sister were singing Beethoven for me when i made them do that Wichita Clarinet

by Wichita Wanker November 8, 2025

Council Clarinet

Usually a neon-colored, lithium-powered pacifier for the economically or socially challenged. It is a disposable vape (usually Blue Razz Lemonade or Watermelon Ice) permanently glued to the hand of a tracksuit-clad youth, dole pole dosser or a single mum with Jaden, Kayden and Lilly Mae in tow.

Named because of the vertical, clarinet-like appearance, and its ubiquity in areas where the local currency is lottery tickets and regret. The "music" played on this instrument is usually the sound of restricted airflow followed by a cloud of sickly-sweet chemical fog that smells like a fruit salad explosion in a chemical plant.

"Walked past the bus stop and got absolutely blinded by a cloud of 'Cotton Candy Ice'. There was a gaggle of year 8s in North Face puffers, all aggressively playing the council clarinet."

by Classic Ghostie December 8, 2025

Lewis and Clarking

When that one friend always talks about leaving the east coast for the west coast, with out a game plan or sufficient funds

My friend just graduated college, he is lewis and clarking it.

by Moneyman206 June 4, 2018

blown out clarinet

An STD, named after anyone that was in a marching band. Symptoms include itchiness, red spots, anal leakage, breast tissue growth and listening to Neil Diamond on repeat for days at a time. Unfortunately no treatment at this time is available except for palliative care including cool baths in oatmeal, listening to Kenny G, and always double bagging it.

Girl 1: oh shit, green eyes and blonde hair, AND he knows fingering techniques?
Girl 2: Dont Lisa, last I heard, he was receiving treatment for a 'blown out clarinet'.

by HM Barber February 22, 2019

B-flat Armored Clarinet

A name for the straight-belled soprano saxophone owing to its similarity to a metal clarinet.

Sam's ok on the alto-sax but he can tear up the b-flat armored clarinet.

by Sir-Hops-A-Lot February 14, 2021