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a week in the jail

When someone is very slow. esp. a sportsman, often a soccer player.

Also used to describe when the passage of time seems painfully slow.
Dan: Look at that guy in the number 3 shirt.
Tim: I know he's slower than a week in the jail.

or

Dan: How's it hangin'?
Tim: Can't wait 'til the weekend. This week's been as slow as a week in the jail.
a week in the jail by Boredy April 1, 2008
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get out of jail free card

giving head to avoid sex
"i was tired, i just gave him head, it's like a get out of jail free card!"
Related Words

Baby Jail 

Slang term for a crib or playpen.
My son would not stop throwing his toys around, so i put him in baby jail.
Baby Jail by frostynemesis March 11, 2011

mobile veil jail 

When one is forced to wear a burka veil, niqab part of the veil, chadri, purdah (face curtain) or other face covering by (1) social convention, (2) one's husband, (3) one's religion, one can be said to be in a mobile veil jail. Often those that wear the veil jail do so because of fear of reprisal or social ostracization or punishment. Since the person wearing the jail veil is generally allowed to move about in society only while wearing the veil it is thus a mobile veil jail. In some Islamic cultures the woman's face is considered "the most tempting part of her body, because what people look at most is the face" and is "awrah, aka intimate parts, which must be covered" as ordered by fatwa. The pre-medieval Bronze Dark Ages belief that the woman's face is an intimate part of her body and can only be seen by her husband or family or woman friends, out of fear that any man that sees her will want to be tempted to rape her thus they jail her for her own protection in a twisted perversion of protecting her by encasing her in cloth coverings. Some women claim to voluntarily wear their mobile veil jails out of respecting their culture or religion or faith, however that just indicates that they are captives and as such are not free. In many western and even Islamic countries the mobile veil jail is not permitted in public in part to prevent the literal covering up of physical abuse by family members. Some ultra-orthodox Jewish women wear the burqa as a symbol of protecting chastity.
Oh look the women there are all sewn up in mobile veil jails which they likely don't have any choice about it for fear if they don't wear them they'll get beaten by their husbands or stoned to death; they think that they'll be pounced upon and raped by the first male to see them; wearing a mobile veil jail is like they are still living in the pre-medieval Bronze Dark Ages.
mobile veil jail by pwvl October 9, 2010

cooma jail 

I heard about someone recently who has been in Cooma Jail, NSW, Australia for 6 months and says that he loves it.
He has been having a great time and is playing pool everyday, getting his clothes washed for him and his meals cooked for him. He says its really cool.
"Man if I go to jail, I hope I get Min. Security at Cooma Jail."
cooma jail by Diego August 21, 2003

stay out of jail 

A kickass Motorhead song from the CD "We Are Motorhead" (2000)

A good plan, if you want to preserve your anal virginity
I decided to stay out of jail, because I'm 17 and weigh 97 lbs.
stay out of jail by Assex 776 January 3, 2008

Ernest Goes To Jail 

A great movie where Ernest finally gets LIGHTNING POWERS
I likeed 'Ernest Goes To Jail'
Ernest Goes To Jail by Treg April 19, 2005