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Mormon blow job 

When a person rests their dick on another person's tongue while lying down and jiggles their penis by giggling. Also known as a John Smith.
Oh yeah, I got a Mormon blow job last night while watching Veggie Tales - I laughed so hard I came all over her face!

Jane only John Smiths me, it's too bad she won't let me watch cat fails while doing it... I'd blow such a load if a rat started chasing a cat around.
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national blow job day 

this day is held any day in november 😛
hey its national blow job day!”
woopie!!”

Dutch Blow Job

Fart under the blanket. Hold it under there until your partner slips under and starts sucking your meat.
Dude I didn’t know Brian had snuck into my room, I dropped my guts and then copped a Dutch blow job.

Ginormous Blow Job aka “GBJ”

When your partner passionately kisses the side of your genitalia while making direct eye contact so powerful that it pierces through your partner’s soul. This act of kindness transcends your partners vibration into an instant state of nirvana. This act of service is completed while viewing your partners gluteus Maximus in a vertical dressing mirror.

“The clouds part, the angels sing, a beam of light shines down upon you, as the atomic bomb detonates”
Partner 1: “I’m going to give you the biggest Ginormous Blow Job aka “GBJ” of your life

**partner 2 looks up to the heavens with complete clarity and responds**

Partner 2: “ There is a god”

CORN CHIP BLOW JOB 

A CORN CHIP BLOW BLOW JOB IS THE ACT OF EATING SOME CORN CHIPS AND CHEWING BUT NOT SWALLOWING,

THEN PROCEEDING TO GIVE ORAL SEX TO A PARTNER.
MY DICK LOOKS LIKE ITS BEEN THROUGH A MEAT GRINDER AND STINGS BECAUSE MY GIRLFRIEND GAVE ME A CORN CHIP BLOW JOB LAST NIGHT.

Peanut Butter Blow Job 

A peanut butter blow job is a blow job where your penis sticks to the roof of her mouth like a bite from a thick peanut butter sandwich requiring some tongue action to get it to release.
My girlfriend is the queen of the peanut butter blow job.

beta access blow job 

when you go down to the beach and you meet a guy with a rv in the parking lot. the guy says he will give you beta access to all blizzard games if you suck his cock. you suck his cock but then he never gives you beta access. your friends make fun of you for the rest of your life.
dude lts went down to goleta beach and gave a beta access blow job!! what a fag!!!
beta access blow job by metchsucks August 29, 2022