Hey Mark Greenwood we get you a job on the gas working away and your ass fall's out you karzy merchant
by Knees up man March 28, 2025

Me: you online tonight?
Friend: yeah I’ll be on at 8pm
*now 10pm and still no sign of them*
Me: You’re an absolute cap merchant!
Friend: yeah I’ll be on at 8pm
*now 10pm and still no sign of them*
Me: You’re an absolute cap merchant!
by Frostiee2209 June 27, 2022

An uncommonly annoying internet troll that exists to spread salt. Often found in online games such as Counter-Strike:GO, LoL, COD, and Chivalry: Medieval Warfare. Salt merchants usually ply their trade through offensive innuendoes and racial/homosexual/religiously charged slurs directed to players on their own team, rather than that of their opponents.
Salt Merchants differ from Salt Gods in that they rarely devolve into simple profanities directed at single players and usually spread to envelope their entire team. Their goal is to trigger as many people as possible. As such, any and all remotely dividing topics are covered in their vitrol.
Salt Merchants differ from Salt Gods in that they rarely devolve into simple profanities directed at single players and usually spread to envelope their entire team. Their goal is to trigger as many people as possible. As such, any and all remotely dividing topics are covered in their vitrol.
Salt Merchant: Hitler did nothing wrong except for letting your Jews anscestors give birth to you, you ableist keking shitlord.
Player 1: Fuck off, Salt Merchant!
Salt Merchant: This team is full of autists holy fuck please kill me now.
Player 1: Fuck off, Salt Merchant!
Salt Merchant: This team is full of autists holy fuck please kill me now.
by Giant Miniature Space Hampster March 5, 2017
