Jessica

Definitely not wifey material. A basic bar hoe that seeks refuge in bars and night clubs so that unsuspecting men can't tell exactly how orange she is as a result of her attachment to layers of bronzer and/or tanning beds. You'll most likely find her gravitating towards men out of her league, or even more pathetic: taken. If you make friends with a Jessica, don't ask her to do your makeup or else you might open your eyes to a raccoon staring back at you in the mirror. She's the greatest friend temporarily, but next thing you know every night is ruined because she's too fixed on another guy and you're stuck covering her ass. One thing is for certain, you'll always look amazing next to Jessica even on your worst of days. At least there's that upside.

Pedro: Hey, man. I need to borrow your Clorox.

Ronnie: Sure thing. Why you need it?
Pedro: Jessica was over last night. I need to get her face off my pillow.

by thornfieldghost August 28, 2016

Jessica’s

Jessica’s are cray cray people that are cheerleaders, they are pretty fun to be around and they can be kinda smart sometimes. They share brains and also sell banana phones, half a banana phone costs $100, and a full one costs $50. They like to say blob, oh my blob, and cheerlead and be jessicaries. (Jessica fairies)

“Uhhhh who’s that?”
“Oh that’s my best friend… she’s a Jessica :)”
“What’s that?”
“Jessica’s are kinda weird and they like to be fairies and say oh my blob”
“Right…”

by Michelleica_0811 November 23, 2021

Jessica

Extremely outgoing girl. She is one of the nicest people you'll ever meet in your life. She is also very smart and pretty even though she tries to deny it. She always hates on herself, and doesn't realize that she is beautiful. She is also gifted athletically and artistically. She is really good at making friendship bracelets!!! Everyone wants to be friends with her and be with her.

Omg is that Jessica?!?!?!
I want to be her!!!

by ASDFASDjalsdk June 26, 2019

Jessica

A word originating from the Swedish Alps used to describe the act of building ceramic roads for raccoons. Can also be used to describe a doorknob of greasy nature.

E.g. 1: Who that guy cares a lot for raccoons.
Yeah he’s a real Jessica for building that road.

E.g. 2 Somebody messed their pizza grease on the doorknob.

Yeah now the doorknob is Jessica

by LonelySlaveInAfrica December 22, 2018

Jessica

She is thick,sexy,more beautiful then the northern lights, the best person in the world and a great friend to people

Jessica is the most beautiful person in the world

by Hatter21 February 1, 2020

Jessica

She is the bitchiest of people rude annoying and she will stab your back she takes your mans and she loves to be rude she’s always on peoples nerves also she dosent deserve her mans she needs sum milk

Girl eww is that Jessica

Boy yes she’s sooo rude

by Cuban-jerzey October 23, 2018

Jessica

Jessica is the best person ever known, she will some day rule the world. She can be mean sometimes but everyone still loves her no matter what. She is a nice girl when she wants to be but can be mean when she wants to be. She's not too girly but she isn't a manly man type of girl. She has a very nice body and likes to go on walks sometimes with her friends. She likes to smack her friend's butt sometimes and especially her boyfriend's for some odd reason. She likes to eat ring pops, especially the blue ones at football games with her friends. She doesn't like getting gifts just like most girls but she really appreciates presents anyway. She can pull off any look and look 100% all the time no matter what she's doing. She has nice silky smooth hair with the cutest smile in the whole world and always has her hair up in a bun, in a rare occasion you see her hair down, so you better appreciate it! Everyone loves Jessica and will never stop.

Jessica is toiiiiight!
Is Jessica coming over tonight? She's pretty entertaining
This Jessica girl hot AF

by fergdogthehog May 8, 2018