Jesus

The One True God and The Son Of God (he is god incarnated in human form so he is god but at the same time the way he was born was by god impregnating mary so he is also the son). He is real, He loves you, He cares about you, He sacraficed himself on the cross for you. All you need to do is believe in him and his sacrafice. I pray you will find your way through christ and know the truth!

"I love Jesus"
"Me too"
"Thank you Jesus for what you did for us!"
"Amen"

by rayfire1234 May 17, 2023

Jesus Christ

A men who has witnessed a lot incidents

He crossed right when a car was coming…
YOU: Jesus Christ!

by Professional Complainer May 21, 2023

Jesus

awsten knight

person 1: hey do you know jesus?
person 2: yea i saw him play A Night Out On Earth last night

by walmartshoppingcart May 22, 2023

Jesus Sperm Theory

We are in a universe sized sperm cell from Jesus and it's going normal sperm speed but we are so small it feels like forever

"Jesus Sperm Theory saved my life man"- Jeffrey Epstein

by Saddam Huissain June 18, 2023

jesusfan69

jesus's 69th biggest fan and a member of Arg Supplies Soulmate Corporation (A.S.S. corp)

omg did you hear what jesusfan69 said today?

yeah they said the capital of Montana is Helena!

by Yes let arson June 19, 2023

Jesus posting

Jesus posting or just Jesusposting is a subsection of "shit posting" where you use religious quotes in a satirical manner

-Did you see Jake post that fucked up photo saying "embrace Jesus"

-Yeah He's just Jesus posting

by HenryS June 28, 2023

Jesused

“Jesused” the past tense of “to Jesus” a verb meaning to be labeled as or changed to Jesus.

Person 1: Oh hey, how have you been, mate?

Person 2: Oh it’s alright, i’ve been *jesused* though so things are a little rough right now

by RobbieRotten478 July 4, 2023