Some neurosurgeon posted a definition for masturbate with a bunch of synonyms and decided it would be a good idea to make them all one big link, which is how you got here to this page. Here's to that genius.
I hope that person catches AIDS from masturbating.
SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement.
SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement.
by Catamount June 21, 2008

by Sexually Attractive Big Mac March 21, 2020

by coreweeee August 29, 2021

Commitment Playshop
Do you have a funny joke or story? How about a favorite song or a picture from the past that makes you laugh?
Let’s have some fun.
A Commitment Playshop is the act of turning work into play, finding joy in doing the things that need to be done to push our ideas and dreams forward while honoring our commitments. It transforms work into a playful, engaging experience, encouraging participants to immerse themselves in their tasks with a sense of wonder, excitement, and experimentation. All things are possible, and participants are more involved in what feels like a dream playdate, where creativity, collaboration, and fun are at the forefront, all while staying true to our commitments (things done with love).
-The Focus is on infusing playfulness into tasks related to our passion projects and commitments, making the process enjoyable and invigorating.
-The Structure is designed with flexible, dynamic activities that blend work, music, jokes, and play seamlessly. They may include creative exercises and collaborative projects that align with the participants' commitments.
-The Tone is lighthearted & enthusiastic, fostering a positive, inspiring atmosphere where participants feel free to explore and innovate.
-And Participants are encouraged to engage deeply & joyfully with tasks, bringing a playful mindset and willset to the work that needs to be done.
-The Desired Outcome is to make progress on commitments, ideas, & dreams while enjoying the journey.
Do you have a funny joke or story? How about a favorite song or a picture from the past that makes you laugh?
Let’s have some fun.
A Commitment Playshop is the act of turning work into play, finding joy in doing the things that need to be done to push our ideas and dreams forward while honoring our commitments. It transforms work into a playful, engaging experience, encouraging participants to immerse themselves in their tasks with a sense of wonder, excitement, and experimentation. All things are possible, and participants are more involved in what feels like a dream playdate, where creativity, collaboration, and fun are at the forefront, all while staying true to our commitments (things done with love).
-The Focus is on infusing playfulness into tasks related to our passion projects and commitments, making the process enjoyable and invigorating.
-The Structure is designed with flexible, dynamic activities that blend work, music, jokes, and play seamlessly. They may include creative exercises and collaborative projects that align with the participants' commitments.
-The Tone is lighthearted & enthusiastic, fostering a positive, inspiring atmosphere where participants feel free to explore and innovate.
-And Participants are encouraged to engage deeply & joyfully with tasks, bringing a playful mindset and willset to the work that needs to be done.
-The Desired Outcome is to make progress on commitments, ideas, & dreams while enjoying the journey.
Prabitha wanted to ensure her team of volunteers was inspired and focused so she engaged her Possibility Advocate to facilitate a Commitment Playshop with her team.
by Possibility Advocate June 21, 2024

Minos fucking prime: Ahh... free at last. O Gabriel, now dawns thy reckoning, and thy gore shall GLISTEN before the temples of Man! Creature of Steel, my gratitude upon thee for my freedom. But the crimes thy kind have committed against humanity are NOT forgotten!
V1: no I win
V1: no I win
by KFCworker April 26, 2025

Did you hear about Ginger? Turns out she pulled a Commit Dead Baby. I guess she shouldn’t have taken all that birth control.
by BenDober September 4, 2019

What say you in your defense?
by TheVeryStrangeOne45 November 28, 2021
