a certified gooner is someone that is open about their addiction to gooning and prolbably has a 30 hour streak of gooning to pornography on the weekend. this person is so down bad for the hub that they even watch it in school, at home, in the car, and more. this person will stay a virgin forever if they do not quit their gooning soon, before it is too late.
Gooner: dude I just stayed up all day over the weekend watching some Angela white and jonny sins going at it
random civil person: 'dials 911' there is a certified gooner on the streets terrorizing the public send help
random civil person: 'dials 911' there is a certified gooner on the streets terrorizing the public send help
by himolton April 22, 2024
Get the certified gooner mug.a person who goons all the time. by all the time I mean all the time. I mean they have a 34 hour gooning streak over the weekend, and they wonder why they are tired all the time. they goon in school, in work (if they manage to get a job) they goon at home most often and they even goon at family gatherings.
dog, i managed to goon for 78 hours a couple days ago
so that's why you weren't at school you certified gooner, and stop looking at my tits loser
But why? I am the epiphony of rizz
i will let you think that
wanna be my sex toy?
*dials 911
so that's why you weren't at school you certified gooner, and stop looking at my tits loser
But why? I am the epiphony of rizz
i will let you think that
wanna be my sex toy?
*dials 911
by himolton April 25, 2024
Get the certified gooner mug.A new layer of hell disguised as a group chat comprised of fat jokes, gay jokes and plenty of nazi jokes.
Notable members: Wizard, Moon, Mage, Skittle and Frank.
Abbreviation: AGG
Notable members: Wizard, Moon, Mage, Skittle and Frank.
Abbreviation: AGG
Fellow #1: "Have you seen the Autism Gooner Gang leaks!?"
Fellow #2: "Of course! it seems like an entire layer of hell!"
Fellow #2: "Of course! it seems like an entire layer of hell!"
by BadMage May 8, 2024
Get the Autism Gooner Gang mug.by Schizophrenic Urban June 6, 2024
Get the garfield gooner mug.The action of chewing up a bunch of McDonald’s fries, then proceeding to blow them into your lover’s asshole.
by Sally0669 July 2, 2024
Get the MC’Gooner mug.An older Yu-Gi-Oh player, so overwhelmed by the idea of chain link 2, that they make a deck whose entire purpose is to summon one Red-Eyes Dark Dragoon and pass. Anyone who wins after this immaculate setup is a "Meta-Slave".
I was trying to get some practice in tonight but I kept running into Yugi-gooners calling pure Kaiju meta.
by Balthazar1124 January 12, 2025
Get the Yugi-gooner mug.Someone who doesn't just watch porn all day, but specifically Goth Femboy Hentai Porn, and also named Mason
"I don't like the real girls, I prefer them 2d and goth, preferably femboys, my name is Mason, and i'm a Major Gooner Chidyav"
by WristWorkoutsOnly January 29, 2025
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