Canoe U.

No officer ever had as much power as a firstie at Canoe U.
by Alo Konsen August 24, 2003
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Fuck your canoe

A joke involving usually three or more parties, a cannibal tribe, and some form of utensil used for stabbing.
An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a Czech are out exploring, and they're captured by cannibals. The king of the cannibals says "We're going to eat you now, because we're cannibals and that's what we do. But we're not savages like we used to be, so we're not going to torture you for three days first...in fact, you can kill yourselves any way you like, we don't care."

The explorers all look rather crestfallen at this news, and the chief hastens to reassure them: "Oh, I know what you're thinking, we've seen it before---you're thinking your life has been a waste, you're going to die out here for nothing, and so on. Well, let me assure you, that just isn't true. We'll use your skin to make our excellent canoes, your hair to make twine, and we'll eat every edible part of you. So really, it's not a waste at all. Now, please get on with it."

The Frenchman says "vive la france", and slits his throat.

The Englishman takes his gun, says "God save the Queen", and shoots himself in the head.

The Czech pulls out a fork and starts stabbing himself---first in the thigh (ouch!), then in the side (yow!), then in the lower leg (argh!)...finally the king of the cannibals says "My god, what are you doing??!!"

And the Czech stabs himself with the fork again and says..."Fuck your canoe."
by LMontiel July 29, 2012
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paddle the stink canoe

Basically the same as paddling the pink canoe, except this would be an exceptionally stinky one. The aroma may be reminiscent of rotting fish or salami.
Gosh, every time Doris comes back from the rest room, it smells like stink-finger. I think she goes there to paddle the stink canoe a lot.
by Running out of patience February 01, 2008
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Double Douche Canoe

Someone who is up shits creek with a turd for a paddle yet takes no responsibility for their situation and find the need to blame everyone else for their predicament.
by harlequinxx July 30, 2010
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Launch the Poo Canoe

"Dude, I think I may just try to launch the poo canoe with Sharon tonight."
"Godspeed. Don't let the river dry up, and steer clear of rocks."
by biggerspeck November 12, 2007
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peanut butter canoe

When you fill your vagina with peanut butter and your dog licks it out.
I had a jar of peanut butter and thought "why not give the dog a peanut butter canoe?" A dog treat if you will.
by Ami Pond March 15, 2023
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