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and I'm the Pope 

Used to show disbeliefe.
John: Dude, i had sex with the hottest girl last night.

Jake: Yea, and I'm the Pope.

Does the Pope shit in the woods? 

Does the Pope shit in the woods? An expression derived from the conjugation of two well known expressions that simply mean "obviously". The two expressions are "does a bear shit in the woods?" and "Is the Pope Catholic?"
Q. Hi babe, do you want me to pick up some wine for diner?"
A. "Does the Pope shit in the woods?!"

anger the Pope 

verb: (to) rebel against authority (except against the government or the legislative, judicial and executive orders orders of one's society)

N.B: the legislative, judicial and executive orders are specifically excluded from this definition because you do not necesarily go to jail for disobeying your parents or ignoring your boss's orders at work etc.
mother: Daniel, go do your homework instead of coming home drunk, bumble-stumbling at the mall or watching porn at Anna's house. For your disobedience, I, for now, take away your privilege to anger the Pope and challenge my authority while you live in my house. Got that?

Daniel: yes, sir (does the military salute).

mother: good. now go do your homework, so I dont have to repeat myself again.
anger the Pope by Uncle Dimma November 7, 2012

playing chess with the pope 

Playing chess with the pope sounds like the classiest way possible to spend your time. Unfortunately, in Iceland, it doesn’t mean enjoying a dignified pastime with a religious leader, but rather is a polite way to say you’re “going number 2”. We have no information on the pope’s thoughts on the matter, nor his abilities as a chess player.
Question: Hey, where is Michael?
Answer:Probably playing chess with the pope.(taking a shit)

flogging the pope 

Self-pleasuring or masturbating. Also known as 'beating the bishop.' The term is believed to have origins in the Catholic seminary, but could have originated in the Vatican.
I am hornier than a three-peckered toad....if I don't get layed pretty soon, you are going to find me 'flogging the pope'
flogging the pope by LaughingAloud September 29, 2005

Does the Pope wear pimp shoes?! 

Indisputably. Without question. On the same continuum as 'is the Pope Catholic?', 'does Dolly Parton sleep on her back?', and 'does a one-legged duck swim in circles?' 'Does the Pope wear pimp shoes?!' sources from the cardinal red Gucci and Prada 'pimp' shoes the Pope sports in public- in other words, total pimp fashion in a pontiff.
Joshua:"Would you like to sleep with Emily?"

Jeremy:"Does the Pope wear pimp shoes?! Of course I want to sleep with Emily, retard. Emily's a totally hot pumpkin smuggler!"