crumpet hole

Another word for a British douche. Also used as another word for a crusty oozing twat

Your a dirty crumpet hole.

Don't stick your Wang in her crumpet hole.

by Portuguese asshole March 9, 2014

Tuna Crumpets

Hardened sex residue from a filthy woman's vagina.

Janice! Don't flick your tuna crumpets at me you dirty whore!

Tell Tina to stop eating her tuna crumpets, it's disgusting...

by myspace.com/gatesofburial September 1, 2009

Arse Crumpet

British version of ass twinkies

he is such an arse crumpet

by junkiejungwoo November 9, 2010

Hanging Crumpet

When your junk is hanging out of your pants; when a man's genitalia is exposed

"I watched TV with Johnny for 20 minutes before I realized he was hanging crumpet. Disgusting."

by bakedlays5447 July 12, 2009

Crumpet Face

Someone who's face is more pitted than the moon. Seal is a nae bad singer but he is a bit of a crumpet face.

Seal eighties singer and crumpet face.

by Duthart December 23, 2007

Cumputer

A computer you only use to look up porn

Guy 1: Hey man, why is this keyboard so sticky?

Guy 2: Oh, thats because its my cumputer

by Rofflez March 28, 2009

Coffee Crumpet

The anus.

It looks like that fellow's coffee crumpet has taken a firm pummelling.

Have you seen the size of that coffee crumpet?

by Redeeris November 2, 2010