Utica

A dying city in upstate New York's rust belt, situated in the verdant Mohawk Valley, just south of Adirondack Park. Utica has a significant population of Italian and Polish Americans and has recently seen a substantial influx of Bosnian immigrants, who have injected a semblance of economic vigor and opportunity to the city. Mouseketeer Annette Funicello was born in Utica. She got out young.

Utica: at least it's not Sarajevo!

by jk64jk July 26, 2006

Utica

Often thought of as New York State's Worst City. Debatable, but certainly not out of the realm of possibility. City of about 52,000. Incredibly lame. Often, the people there have an ironic attachment to their dead city. No jobs at all. No skyline. People there don't seem to like to read, either because their library is open for maybe 10 hours each week.

"Dude, can we stop in Utica so I can get some insulin?"

"I'm afraid not. Utica is a shithole and it is better for you to die than go to Utica."

"You're right."

by KirkCameron May 30, 2006

Utica College

One of the worst college institutions in New York. Every team sucks except Women's basketball and sometimes Men's Hockey. Half the population is African-American, the other half is too scared to leave their rooms. 39% of the girls are lesbian, 89% of whats left are ugly. The weather blows, the financial aid sucks, the town it's located in is dead and gone. The Most fun thing to do is 20 minutes away at club Lava. Some Utica clubs are cool too, when they stay open. That is, if you like drugs, illegal operations, guns, knives, and deaths. Sometimes the grass is green, that's a plus. The dorms look like an insane asylum, and someone out of third grade could get accepted here.

5th grader: Mommy, well i ever go to college?

Mom: Don't worry son, there's always Utica College.

5th Grader: Can I play football there?

Mom: anyone with eyes and 2 legs can. You're all set!

by getmeoutofhereeeee May 7, 2010

utica

a city in new york that absolutely sucks. it is only famous for being a branch of Dunder Mifflin in The Office. Other than that, no one has ever heard of it.

Karen left Scranton to go to Utica because Jim broke up with her.

by dotheshizz June 19, 2011

Utica

A sad sad little place in the middle of New York. If cities could cry Utica would have drowned long ago. Its crap. In the summer you can't even sleep. In the winters you lose tons of money due to heating. No one even knows it exists.

Person 1: Hey were you from?
Person 2: Utica
Person 1: Where? I don't think I've heard of that.
Person 3: You lucky jerk

by Sick of Snow March 7, 2011

SUNY Utica

Also called SUNY Institute of Technology (SUNYIT), despite the schools amazing lack of technology. It is part of the SUNY system. Located in the decrepit city of Utica NY, whose number one employer is Denny's down on Genesee St. A school notorious for lying to its applicants as to how many credits will transfer in. The school advertises how it has diverse wildlife on campus, consisting of Canadian Geese, Deer, and Turkey. Despite the wildlife, the food is recycled from events where the school sells out facilities meant for the students.

Students who initially attend regret their decision weeks later, but find that the credits will not transfer anywhere. The school acts as the quicksand of the SUNY system.

Relative: "Where do you go to school?"
Student: "I go to school in Utica"
Relative: "Oh, that's a great school, good for you!"
Student: "No... I go to SUNY Utica"
Relative: "Oh, I'm sorry"
Student: "Me too"

by Ghostalker474 March 22, 2009

Uticano

A Puerto Rican or other Latin American who came to Utica, NY via New York City, Florida or California any number of years ago and has made a life for him or herself in this decaying cesspool of forgotten human beings as either a bus driver, landlord, police officer or any other job that pays a semi-livable wage. The pejoritative connotations of this word are due to the fact that there must be something obviously wrong with any Hispanic who would leave his or her native country and move to America's anus. The perjoritave connotations are augmented by the fact that these transplanted Hispanics don't seem to realize (yet, at least) that they made a poor decision by moving from, say, El Salvador or Mexico to Utica, NY.

If that Hispanic guy's from Puerto Rico what the Hell is he doing in Utica?
I don't know, I guess he's a Uticano.

I got chased by some Uticanos on my way to school.

Italian Vinny: Uticanos are taking all our jobs.

Redneck "Red" Smith: Uticanos are taking all our jobs.

Polish Margaret Muntz: Uticanos are taking all our jobs (even though we don't work).

Bosnian Igor Slosovich: We have to compete against Uticanos for jobs.

African-American Otis Freeman: When we go to prison all of the Uticano prison guards rough us up.

by Jamallerian October 13, 2007