monkey sheets

Bed sheets stained with spooge because you masturbated and then subsequently ejaculated onto them.
Monkey sheets are frequently characterised by having a queer odour.

{Beavis and Butt-Head dressing themselves as ghosts for Halloween}

{Beavis}: Hey Butt-Head, this sheet smells funny.
{Butt-Head}: Yeah, huh huh. Those are my special monkey sheets.
{Beavis}: O fuck! Get it off! Get it off!! GET IT OFF!!!

by Telephony February 15, 2020

Satin Sheets

An amazing feel to the naked body & perfect for having sex on.

Keirsten enjoyed Chad's bed last night cause his wife bought new Satin Sheets at Kohls!

by SlopNChop October 6, 2016

Swindle sheets

Trucker's slang for the log books they are usually required to take along on their trips. Some truckers hate taking these along, because they have to document all sorts of information that may affect how much money they make.

"...We tore up all a our swindle sheets an' left 'em settin' on the scales..."

by Chairman May 2, 2005

3 sheets to the wind

To understand this phrase we need to enter the arcane world of nautical terminology. Sailors' language is, unsurprisingly, all at sea and many supposed derivations have to go by the board. Don't be taken aback to hear that sheets aren't sails, as landlubbers might expect, but ropes (or occasionally, chains). These are fixed to the lower corners of sails, to hold them in place. If three sheets are loose and blowing about in the wind then the sails will flap and the boat will lurch about like a drunken sailor. (credit to phrases.org.uk)

When he attempted to leave bar, He did not get far as he was already 3 sheets to the wind.

by LilDog May 9, 2014

beef sheets

Over sized vaginal lips that hang outside of the body

"That chick had some major beef sheets"

by Nic1118 July 9, 2007

slap the sheets

to participate in the act of sleeping

I couldn't slap the sheets until she licked the yoat off my leg.

by Tetay October 28, 2006

Heat In The Sheets

When vigorous sex and farts occurs at the same time

Kaylee: Did you enjoy last night with Chad?
Kiersten : Oh yes but we should have skipped taco bell cause there was some Heat In The Sheets boy did it smell bad!
Kaylee : Well sex is usually uncomfortable anyway so what's a little smell gonna hurt!
Kiersten : It wasn't the smell that bothered me it was when he put me in a 69 and my face was near his ass!
Kaylee : O you poor thing next time get some old spice and spray his ass before you fuck!
Kiersten : Wow good plan!

by SlopNChop March 12, 2017