murphy's law

1.Complex set of laws about disasters, but leads down to "Anything that can go wrong will."
2. Not fucking Mrs. Murphy

1. My computer died and took my term paper with it!

2. Man, you gotta hide me, Gennady, I just boned Mrs. Murphy and Mr. Murphy has the gun!

by Not so super DJ Gennady September 12, 2003

murphy's law

The law that Eddie Murphy will never again be funny until he goes back to Saturday Night Live. The good one, from the nineties. Start working on that time machine, Mr. Ed.

MR. ROBINSON'S NEIGHBORHOOD
"I spent the day/ making a friend/ for life/ too bad/ i was making it with/ the land lord's wife

Others:

WHITE LIKE ME
BUCKWHEAT SINGS
BUCKWHEAT GETS SHOT
BUCKWHEAT DIES

by Radioman December 2, 2003

murphy's law

Murphy's Law

Any bad shit that seems to want to happen will happen no matter what the fuck you do about it! I beleive that the problem gods are a result of this.

Example of Murphy's Law

"If you piss off the problem gods......
Well dont piss off the problem gods."

by Richard Porter September 25, 2006

murphy's law

also known in england as Sod's Law

by MICHELLE October 15, 2003

Murphy's Law of Clothes-drying

Similar to the old "wax your car if you want it to rain" joke, this saying reads: "It can be mild and sunny for days on end, but then just as soon as you hang out a whole bunch o' laundry to dry, THAT'S when da sun will abruptly disappear behind huge dark clouds and you'll have a bleepin' MONSOON FOR A WEEK!"

The weather had been totally "bright 'n' balmy" for a good while, and so one afternoon last week I tried to save money and electricity by using my clothesline instead of the watts-sucking dryer, but then it rained heavily during the night, and it's been foggy and drizzly ever since! Sounds like a classic case of "Murphy's Law of Clothes-drying" to me.

by QuacksO October 30, 2018

Murphy's Law of Weather vs. Gumption

"You can apathetically sit around the house for hours, and the weather will be sunny and mild. But then just as soon as you actually manage to groggily struggle up off'n yer but and head for the door to be productive with outdoor activities, it will either start raining, the temps will soar/plummet, or the breeze will die down and allow black flies and mosquitoes to swarm you."

I am a long-term vicitim of Murphy's Law of Weather vs. Gumption, so I employ the unconventional strategy of working naked outdoors (long live tall dense shrubbery along the road out front!) so that I can feel cooler and move about more easily than I could with restrictive clothing, and thus I am able to strugglingly get work done during more-favorable weather, even when I strongly don't feel like it.

by QuacksO September 12, 2019

Murphy's Law of Checkout-Lines

"If you aren't in a hurry to leave the store, there will be little or no delay in getting a clerk to ring you up. But if you're pressed for time --- or even more so, if you're car-pooling with someone who is on a tight schedule --- THAT'S when there will be hold-ups galore... a long line in front of you, a customer with one or more heaped-full shopping-carts, one or more price-discrepancies that hafta be tediously resolved (i.e., the puzzled clerk is obliged to walk back with you to the shelf to look at the price-labels, a supervisor or the store-manager has to be called over), a balky card-scanner, etc."

Whenever someone who's giving me a ride is kind enough to let me stop at a store to grab a few items, I always try to make very sure that I have everything all "set and prepared" before I head to the register, so that I personally seldom create a problem (i.e., cause any delays myself with issues like not having the proper payment ready or being unsure of a price or quantity) with Murphy's Law of Checkout-Lines. That way, even if my driver has to wait linger than expected for me to hastily scamper back outside with my loaded shopping-bags, he won't be able to direct his impatient frustration at me --- "Sorry for the delay; I did indeed get everything tossed in my cart very quickly, but there was a long line in front of me, and they were short-staffed today, so they only had once register open."

by QuacksO October 31, 2019