caught masturbating

The act of being discovered while you are masturbating. This usually leads to pure humiliation, especially if the discoverer is a celebrity.

"Chase Rodrigue masturbated in his mom's truck when she went out to buy some groceries. However, our local weatherman caught him masturbating."

by Rob. February 2, 2003

poop while masturbating

A spuce is masturbation while taking a shit.

Man, you ever poop while masturbating? Got water splashed on my balls, totally ruined my spuce.

by TomatoKid November 17, 2013

masturbating

What you were probably doing a few moments ago.

Joe: Whatcha doing?
Jimmy: Masturbating.
Joe: Cool, me too.

by Chuck Norris' son February 7, 2009

Flasturbating

The act of masturbating and farting at the same time.

He's not coming out tonite becuase he's probably flasturbating

by Calgary Kendal February 24, 2007

Masturbating Monkey

When a monkey in the forest or at the zoo get's a erection and grabs his penis and starts to jack off like a car piston and starts shooting sperm all over the place, then he goes "HOOO OHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH HOO HO HOO!!!!" when the male monkey starts to think oh the female monkeys. and sperm starts to land on you and you child.

Child: mommy, WTF IS THAT BLACK MONKEY DOING?!?
Mom: Don't be racist!!! He's just a masturbating monkey

Doctor: hey Steve, that monkey seems to be masturbating?
Steve: I think he is, we should test his heart rate to make sure it's safe for the masturbating monkey.
Steve: ok... WHAT?! IT'S OVER 9000!!!!!!

by theaveragejoe33 October 27, 2010

Fasterbating

The art of masterbating really fast and cumming within a 2 minute range is called Fasterbating

David: Well, my mom was coming home soon, but I was majorly horny... so I started Fasterbating.

Jim Bob: And...

David: 1 minute 30 seconds

Jim Bob: Nice

by Chaz E. February 28, 2008

Masturbating Muscle

The muscle you develop between your forearm and bicep on the arm of the hand you masturbate with.

John: Hey broski, wanna hang tonight?

Joe: Ehh... I dunno, I was really gonna work on toning my masturbating muscle tonight.

John: Oh.. I getcha, I worked on it last night.

by aaronthejoo May 11, 2011