A Manky Wank

Having your partner shit on your bell-end whilst you wank

Geoff: "Uh uh uh, yeah baby, I'm cumming"
Toni: "Take it out, I have a turd brewing so you can have a manky wank"
Geoff: "For fuck's sake! Now I've gone limp!"
Toni: "You are such a loser"
Geoff: "Bitch!"
Toni: "Faggot!"

by John Lidgley May 23, 2008

a posh wank

When one wanks poshly with the butler watching

I had a posh wank this morning it was splendid

by _Xx_jen.Rm_xX_ July 27, 2017

A Work Wank

A work wank is a term used to when an individual masturbates during work/paid hours.

Andy: "Got a little horny so had a work wank, do it on their time and get paid"

by foshoure May 31, 2020

A lonely wank in a Travelodge

You at the end of the day when the gig has finished and all the pretty girls have gone home with their handsome boyfriends to have it off and you're in a cheap Travelodge hotel room all lonely and trying to imagine yourself with those girls by having it off with yourself (masturbating). Sadly, it rarely helps the situation and you end up more depressed than before.

The gig has ended and all the pretty girls have gone home with their boyfriends and I'm here having a lonely wank in a Travelodge. So depressing.

by TheFunnyGuy88 June 30, 2022

wank-a-lank

When something is very very bad, or wank.

Ben: Ah mate, i well have to work sunday.

Biz: Thats fucking wank-a-lank mate.

by BizBiz December 19, 2006

wank in a batman suit

This is a phrase which can be used to describe something as not worth doing, or useless.

For when you don't want to do something, as opposed to phrases such as "I'd rather Die" and "cba" "cbb"

Me: Want to go out later?
You: Nah, I'd Rather Wank in a Batman Suit

Me: That football player is crap!
You: He might as well Wank in a batman suit

by Craig MooGa June 2, 2008

Wank And A Half

A fuck that's only marginally better than a wank (ie. having sex with this chick is only slightly better than masturbating to your best pornographic material).

Technically a term that only applies to 6's, but apply to all normal day women to remind you there’s nothing at stake.

A guy sees your run-of-the-mill hot chick and is not impressed.

Guy 1: She's a Wank And A Half, isn't she?
Guy 2: Totally.

Guy 1 considers meeting her.

Guy 1: Should I bother?
Guy 2: Can’t even pretend she’s worth it.


A chick is a WAAH if she's only got her physical appearance and it's not even of supermodel quality.

Say WAAH!!!

by Mr. Tangfastic February 17, 2009