Open the Church Doors

When fucking doggie style, a girl reaches around and pulls her ass cheeks apart allowing for deeper penetration. This is especially helpful when done by a woman with a big ol' ass.

"Open the church doors baby, I want to give my confession!"

"When she opened the church doors, I think my cock hit her cervix!"

by 'Noke Man August 11, 2008

Church Stretton

A small "town" the size of a village in Shropshire, loved by old people and sad hikers, hated by lovers of fun and entertainment.

2. anywhere with a large conservative majority

Sad old couple: Church Stretton is beautiful!

Kid: No it isn't! There's fuck all to do

by Winkwinkwinkwinkwinkwink December 13, 2010

churchie

1. a person who is willing to party five weeks in a row, or just sit in the sun, while neglecting duties such as dish washing and procrastinating his/her study.

2. a person who lives in the dutch student house in Groningen, NL which has been a monastery before and is now called ChurchMansion.

dude, your summer plans sounds very fun, you must be a churchie!
me and the churchies are gonna rent that one house in the middle of nowhere and party all day every day there!

by stabilinator May 16, 2021

earthy churchy

1. a person or thing with hippie or tree-hugging tendencies; someone stuck in the 60s and/or 70s, usually a stoner or former stoner

2. a person who is totally into the 'green earth' movement that recycles, buys organic foods, and picks up others' trash

Did you see all the peeps at the music festival? They were all earthy churchy and shit.

by lotuspanda March 15, 2008

ream that chaunch

to fornicate, usually in an especially aggressive and forceful manner. used by males in reference to sex with a female.

dude, you should ream that chaunch. itll be good for you.

by ed the viking December 26, 2008

Landover Baptist Church

A fictional church located in the fictional universe of Freehold, Iowa; its website was created by Chris Harper and Paul A. Bradley as parody of Fundamentalist christianity; the website is known for it's satirical views on religion, christianity, and the Bible. Some people actually take it seriously, but it is purely satire.

Person A: "Hey did you read this Christian website?"
Person B: "No, what does it say?"
Person A: "It says that homosexuals have long hair."
Person B: "Didn't Jesus have long hair?"
Person A: "That's the thing: it says when Jesus accepted himself as Lord and Savior that the Holy Spirit whispered in his ear for him to get a hair cut."
Person B: "What, that's absurd! "
Person C: "Yeah, kinda sounds like Landover Baptist Church and its black propaganda."

by Estelwen June 3, 2014

The Fifth Church

The Fifth Church, also known as the Church of Fifthism or the Fifthist Fellowship, is a highly secretive religious organization which possesses ties throughout the entertainment industry. Despite repeated investigations, culminating in the 2007 nationwide sting known as "Operation Stargazer", no further details regarding its doctrines, its practices, its number of members, or its goals have been confirmed, although a watchlist is maintained of 100 confirmed and suspected Fifthist celebrities and other prominent personalities. Its origins have been placed in varying points in the mid-20th Century and various locations in North America and Asia, but some sources have dated it to centuries earlier.

The Fifth Church has never communicated directly with the SCP Foundation, but is to be considered a hostile force.

The Fifth Church is a fucking joke. It's a complete mess.

by Mad Dummy April 9, 2019