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Jaked

To be distracted for a prolonged conversation about nothing by your boss or manager. This distraction generally results in you missing or being late for a meeting, late home or unable to complete work. It is recognised within your organisation as a legitimate excuse.
Sorry I'm late, I was on my way home and I was jaked at the lift.
Sorry I missed your meeting, I was jaked in the hall
Can I get an extension on that proposal? I was jaked when I was trying to finish it.
by Victimofjaking April 19, 2014
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Jake. A

he is the best guy you will ever meet so sweet he gives me cavities he is as nice as a punch of care bears i love him he is the best boy friend every he is my whole world i would not even give him up for bacon.
if u look perfect up in the dictionary it will say Jake. A
by chichi doll November 1, 2013
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Jake

A Jake is a person that is a sex machine. There is only one kind of Jake. A popular, athletic, sexy, love machine, pussy magnet. And a Jake dick is so big, it is more than likely known as a cockzilla!
Guy 1:Dude, have you seen Liz today?

Guy 2:No, why?

Guy 3:She's walking like a penguin, Jake must've gotten a hold of her!

Guy 4:Jesus Christ!
by PooperDoppers December 5, 2016
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Jake

Man you like Marylin Manson? Dude you’re such a Jake stop it
by Blistersonmycheetofingers December 1, 2018
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Jake

I guy that likes girls more after he breaks up with them. You can often find a Jake lying about his sexual history often too
Why does he keep going with his exes? He must me a Jake
by Suhhmandood July 28, 2017
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Jake

A simple ninja turtle type dude, with a fully womanised 28 inches in very leeeeaasssst principal, soon to be released into the joy of Joyceian shapeshifting, where his 75th percentile wanger will with a bit of faith achieve a min 75 purple headed inches, and ultimately minimum... 100 inches all round, theoretically with as many womenz as adore the penis in and or around their mouths, (and pussies and batties) worshipping it from any which perspective, while he worships them right back, in the form of ecstasy while he is hard, and then cumming. Lol.

Jake is also known as a galaxy of multi coloured uppers downers, and every 'drug' under the sun, in the sense they all eminate from his body in some respect, and he's tried most of 'em. Doors of Perception is Jim Morrison's domain though, not that Jimi, aka Jake, hasn't done cactus, and been straight-up dome tripping on it a couple times, level 3 he'd guess, with elements of brambles and crown of thorn type visuals, from what I recall... lol.

Also, don't forget love for my bruddas (though technically I'm white), as are many of my brothers.
Jake, an extraordinarily talented mathematician, without being fully savant like in his abilimities yet anyways, who is lazy as a mother flipper, and who has the biggest of all dicks. Full stop. Jesus, Krishna, Buddha, take your pick, triune nature in his own right (Moses too by the way). Still begrudgingly admits the father is 'Greater than I", despite the fact he legit forsook me of the first cross.
by DenimIsAwesomeOnLucy August 1, 2017
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jake

A individual who is pure cringe and is really white he wants to cuss cool but all he talks about are your socks
Jake: Yo sup homie what you doin in the his house.
A boy named Dom: Sup fag.
Jake: Yo you want to box with white socks hair ass.
Dom: Damn not my socks.
Jake: Lets fight bitch.
Dom: I don't fight mentally retarded kids that only talk shit about my sock.
by Dominator592 August 10, 2017
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