Murphy

An imaginary friend who is used as a scapegoat to get yourself out of conversations

I dont understand you guys from Brooklyn at first. Man, where the fuck is Murphy?

by urassisgrass September 5, 2014

murphy lee

Murphy Lee is so FINE, and he doin his thang.He reppin hard. GO HEAD BABY
DO WHAT YOU DO
Ashley From Mo-town I'm gonna Moultrie on the map

by Murphy's wife September 13, 2003

Murphy in Retrograde

A special time in the universe when, everything that can, will go Right.

After I found my lost class ring, and the Prize Patrol knocked on my door, I knew that was, Murphy in Retrograde.

by Chefspam March 20, 2015

Murphy's Intersection Law

When there's a four-way stop sign intersection a quarter mile ahead of you with no cars in it, that suddenly has cars converging from all sides at the same as you, making it impossible to discern who's supposed to go, and making a hazardous situation.

I had a bad case of Murphy's Intersection Law driving home. No one knew who was supposed to go, and we all crashed into each other.

by Tbonerstalloner August 30, 2017

Murphyism

Knowing that something is going to go wrong and plowing through anyway due to the off chance something actually goes your way.

Guy 1:" I'm going to go talk to that chick. She's a solid 9.5."
Guy 2: "Are you nuts? No shot man, just go home and choke the chicken. This has rejection written all over it."
Guy1: "I know but Murphyism is giving me some weird confidence right now. "

by BasedMillennial June 18, 2018

Murphy's Pedestrian-Perks Law

Refers to the infuriatingly-common "lousy timing" occurrence of your seldom encountering the usually-hoped-for opportunities/pleasantries (i.e., neighbors relaxing on their front porches/lawns whom you can shoot the breeze with on your way by, pretty girls to hold hands with and "chat up for a few", sizable numbers of discarded returnable containers, etc.) whenever you're out for a stroll or otherwise leisurely traipsing around your local area on foot, yet when you either hitch a ride with someone or are "a man on a mission" in your own vehicle and thus you can't "acceptably" stop to avail yourself of any of these assorted "sidewalk delights", the roadsides you travel along will either be "chock-full of friendlies" or "Bottle/Can City", and so you'll be mentally "climbin' da walls" at having to agonizingly pass on by all of those much-desired goodies.

It was foggy and chilly when I started out walking around town to complete my weekly errands-list, and so there was hardly another soul outdoors, but then sometime later when I was riding back again with a neighbor who'd offered me a lift home, the weather turned clear and balmy again, and there were lots of smiley-faced sundress-clad cuties strolling the walks all over town! Guess it was Murphy's Pedestrian-Perks Law at work!

by QuacksO July 21, 2018

Murphy's Law of Clothes-drying

Similar to the old "wax your car if you want it to rain" joke, this saying reads: "It can be mild and sunny for days on end, but then just as soon as you hang out a whole bunch o' laundry to dry, THAT'S when da sun will abruptly disappear behind huge dark clouds and you'll have a bleepin' MONSOON FOR A WEEK!"

The weather had been totally "bright 'n' balmy" for a good while, and so one afternoon last week I tried to save money and electricity by using my clothesline instead of the watts-sucking dryer, but then it rained heavily during the night, and it's been foggy and drizzly ever since! Sounds like a classic case of "Murphy's Law of Clothes-drying" to me.

by QuacksO October 30, 2018