National Masturbate Day

It time to have some fun !! April 13 is National Masturbate Day !! Go jerk off or finger! Any will do!!

Man, Ricky today is National Masturbate Day ! Let’s beat our meats together!

by Braylen215 May 25, 2018

masturbate

The way men who are doomed to be virgins forever pleasure themselves. The best way to do it is to use the forehand technique. Trust me, I know. Seriously though, if you can reach an orgasm, you are a true man. SO go try it, do it in front of your mother, your father if you're gay. Which i'm not. So i never did it in front of my father. Trust me.

Dude, while i had an orgy last night with 69 girls, you and your dad masturbated and 69'd. own3d.

by Master Masturbate June 16, 2005

masturbate

Something that Jesus watches you do. Especially when you are stuck in a porta-john and an angry tranny is banging on the door shouting "GO FASTER!"

As Bob stared at the midgets having sex on his computer monitor, he pulled out his pecker and masturbated. As he was in the middle of wankin' one out, he noticed it was dark outside and noticed a bluish light flash outside his window and heard a huge thunder. Suddenly, LIGHTNING STRUCK HIS HOUSE AND EVERYONE DIED!

And on that fine day, Jesus said the two words in a booming voice that humanity will forever cherish, "Don't masturbate."

by MrCat January 24, 2015

masturbate

to fire ones death star
OR
to open ones fire hose

by Anonymous January 25, 2003

fasturbation

The act of not eating for atleast 24 hours, and then fapping as pay off.

"Gosh, I hate being a muslim, the only way to make fasting tolerable is by ye olde fasturbation motivation.

by titfacemcgee November 19, 2011

furry masturbater

when a man rubs rabbit fur on his dick and gets aroused and then cums

Aw yah i love being a furry masturbater! It feels so good!

by Ryan Ferguson July 20, 2006

Frazturbate

This is an unusual variant of the common 'shank (shower wank). It involves a very specific routine of begining the ritual of self-endulgance with hot shower water until fully erect. However, there is a subtle twist compared with the conventional 'shank'. At the point of full erection, the hot water tap is turned off, leading to ice cold temperatures. It is left at this temperature until the erection has fully deflated and the testicles retreated internally. After this the hot water is turned back on and the act of masturbation is continued until final climax. It is believed the logic behind 'fratuzbation' is to increase the sexual pleasure of the final orgasm.

John frazturbated in the shower.

John and his friends frazturbated together.

John frazturbated for heightened sexual pleasure.

by The Witness93 October 7, 2012