When someone justifies their frowned-upon, or even illegal, actions by comparing themself to Jesus disobeying the Roman Empire by spread his beliefs. The general idea is that if Jesus was doing the right thing by broke the law in order to spread the word of god, then it is already for them to break the law in order to <insert action here>.
"Sure, its illegal, but did that stop Jesus when the Romans said his mission was illegal???"
*off to the side*
"Holy shit, he pulled the fuckin' Jesus Card!!"
*off to the side*
"Holy shit, he pulled the fuckin' Jesus Card!!"
by Xavien35449510 February 2, 2024
Get the Jesus Card mug."Jesus cheated on me again*
by mayay February 4, 2024
Get the Jesus mug.The son of God according to the Christian Faith. He is charitable, kind and loves everyone, even minorities, despite what "Christians" may say. It has been claimed that he died and resurrected, though this has been unproven. Notably, on May 31st 2025, he was reborn as a Furry Femboy identical in appearance to the fictional character Reggie The Rat made by Whygena.
Person 1: THE HELL DO YOU MEAN JESUS GOT REBORN AS A FURRY FEMBOY WHAT THE FUCK
Person 2: I can't tell if this is blasphemy or not due to it being true.
Person 3: this is the funniest shit ever oh my god
Person 2: I can't tell if this is blasphemy or not due to it being true.
Person 3: this is the funniest shit ever oh my god
by Silly Billy, unintelligent June 2, 2025
Get the Jesus mug.Jesus posting or just Jesusposting is a subsection of "shit posting" where you use religious quotes in a satirical manner
by HenryS June 28, 2023
Get the Jesus posting mug.by DevilhunterBFMV July 13, 2023
Get the talkin to jesus mug.A fictional character who is the figure head of the Christian faith. One of 4,200 religions here on planet earth. There is absolutely no historical evidence at all that he ever existed. None. Jesus didn't die on a cross as it is physically impossible to nail a human to a crucifix and that human defeat gravity. Jesus was not born without his father impregnating his mother, that is completely impossible and goes against anything science and medicine tells the human race today. Jesus and his cultists do not believe in science or medicine. Logic and common sense are also viewed as an attack on "faith" which allows his followers, especially here in the States of America, to cry and bitch about ANYONE who disagrees with their infantile bullshit. Jesus was invented so that Christians could control other humans, especially women. This is also a common thread in almost all religions which not only degrade women, it allows wars to be fought in his name killing millions of non combatants and blaming other religions for being somehow wrong. Catholics use Jesus to rape and sexually assault under age boys by the tens of thousands while their supposed conduit to "heaven" turns a blind eye to the cancer. They would rather murder women for getting an abortion than stop all of the pedophiles infesting their church. Jesus is also a grift for churches here in the States of America.
Soldier 1: Oh man, that was a close one! That almost hit me!
Soldier 2: Jesus fucking christ that was close!
Some zealot: Do you have Jesus in your heart?
Poor bastard: No it's blood. Who the fuck is Jesus?!
Joel Osteen: Jesus has a plan for you!
My asshole: Joel, go fuck yourself you goddamn Jesus grifter!!
Soldier 2: Jesus fucking christ that was close!
Some zealot: Do you have Jesus in your heart?
Poor bastard: No it's blood. Who the fuck is Jesus?!
Joel Osteen: Jesus has a plan for you!
My asshole: Joel, go fuck yourself you goddamn Jesus grifter!!
by Asymmetric shits for trump September 28, 2022
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