Jesus Juice

Midwest slang for orange juice containing the drug propylhexedrine aka Benzedrex. The drug can be bought over the counter in the form of a nasal inhaler normally used for allergies. If you break the inhaler and take out the cotton inside and soak it in orange juice or any acidic beverage for 24 hours the active ingredient (propyl) is extracted. Propyl has similar effects to amphetamine and methamphetamine and induces a state of intense focus and euphoria. It is also horrible for your vascular system and causes severe vasoconstriction.

In simple terms you will go sicko mode and probably will end up on meth if you weren’t already when you took the Jesus Juice. It’s called Jesus Juice because it makes you feel like Jesus and it will bring you back from the dead.

Me: Hey bro do you want some speed laced orange juice?

Homie: Oh, shit did you put your Vyvanse into OJ?

Me: Nah I ran out like a week ago, this is Jesus Juice! It feels just as good if not better. You can feel your brain cells dying so it must be good.

by danasp_42 December 27, 2019

João De Jesus

João De Jesus is the most amazing person you'll ever meet, when he comes into your life he will be ur highest point and only take you higher. He has a 11 incher and going strong, He's caring and the sweetestperson you'll ever meet, curious about the world and all the cultures and histories and fucken smexxxxy in a hoodie. Has multiple pink florida shorts and even though he acts gay and retared he isn't ( the game part), he loles to work on himslef and fet better and gives back to the community, may or may not be racists, he comforts well and is understanding

He has a beautiful soul and a beautiful at of seeing life and will open u up so many new experiences, he will be the best thing that will ever happen to you.

Jack : " if João De Jesus was gay id hit that"
Bob : " nah he's just a little dyslexic, but he's the best person you'll ever know"

by He's my world March 27, 2024

Jesus's spizzim

When you jizz with no control, even though she said she’s not on birth control.

Yo dude, I just Jesus's spizzim , she did tell me she’s not on birth control; I just couldn’t help it.

by Kachowism August 10, 2024

Ryan (Jesus)

I've the body and power of Christ but my mind has been replaced with the the spawn of Satan

AHH have you seen Ryan (Jesus) over there

by NNN is for losers May 28, 2021

marijuana jesus

marijuana jesus is a person who smokes the holy plant cannabis, walks on water, and is made up.

marijuana jesus: that was some nice bud judas
judas: im gonna go betray you and smoke all your weed

by marijuana jesus December 9, 2016

Jesus

Slang
hay-SUS/JeSUS
1. Fruity, Gay
Used against people named jesus or jesús

Jesus: Hey lets snuggle bro
Jim: Mannn your acting hella jeSUS

by SunRoseGiggles March 9, 2022

Jesus Card

When someone justifies their frowned-upon, or even illegal, actions by comparing themself to Jesus disobeying the Roman Empire by spread his beliefs. The general idea is that if Jesus was doing the right thing by broke the law in order to spread the word of god, then it is already for them to break the law in order to <insert action here>.

"Sure, its illegal, but did that stop Jesus when the Romans said his mission was illegal???"
*off to the side*
"Holy shit, he pulled the fuckin' Jesus Card!!"

by Xavien35449510 February 2, 2024