masturbation; playing five on one, priming the piss pump; playing tug of war with ol' cyclops.
Following his vasectomy, he needed to produce 25 ejaculations over a 6-month period to assure testicular emasculation. In order to do this 25 times, he had to perform the five-finger knuckle shuffle on his one-eyed, blue-veined, purple-headed, custard-chucking, salty yogurt slinger.
by weave March 21, 2003
mugGet the the five finger knuckle shuffle on the one-eyed, blue-veined, purple-headed, custard-chucking, salty yogurt slinger.mug.
A mystical midget Guido that enjoys fist pumping girls that have been roofied in the ass. This often causes tell-tell bruises on the butt cheeks at midget height. His magical one horn allows him to remove women’s panties with out there knowledge. His keen perpetrating skills allow him to steal random item of interest. This can include: Credit cards, iPods and women’s virginity. He is also an Ace with the Mexican Air force.
Rob: Once again my fiancé was perpetrated by a One-Eyed, One-Horned, Flying Purple Penetrating Fist Pumping Midget Guido Roofie Slipping Panty Bandit in Atlantic City.

Jack: Just look on the bright side, its better then cleaning her up after good time’s with good friend’s and some hot lunche's!

Rob: Ya, your right... I'll just Shot! Shot! Shot, Shot Shot! her other but cheek, what a hotmess!
by bboy domo.... January 18, 2010
mugGet the One-Eyed, One-Horned, Flying Purple Penetrating Fist Pumping Midget Guido Roofie Slipping Panty Banditmug.
Some neurosurgeon posted a definition for masturbate with a bunch of synonyms and decided it would be a good idea to make them all one big link, which is how you got here to this page. Here's to that genius.
I hope that person catches AIDS from masturbating.



SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement.
by Catamount June 21, 2008
mugGet the SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermimug.

One Eyed Willy

After not participating in any type of sexual activity for months, you finally jerk off into a girl’s face with a geyser load so big and powerful it forces her eyeball back into her brain, rendering her socket empty and causing her to wear an eye patch for the rest of her life.
It had been so long since I blew a load when I finally did, I turned Shaquanda into a One Eyed Willy.
by Zorbathefreak June 15, 2024
mugGet the One Eyed Willymug.

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