BURNT TURD

CHIX THAT TAN SO MUCH THEIR SKIN LOOKS LIKE A FAKE LEATHER BAG OR A BURNT TURD

HEY DID YA PEEP DAT BURNT TURD OVER YONDER SHES SORTA HOT BUT FKN HER WOULD BE LIKE BANGIN A OLD ASS CATCHERS MITT AND DAT TAN SMELL ITS LIKE HONEY MIXED WITH B.O.

by SHANNON MOTOWAKAN October 21, 2011

Turds on the hood

The food residue splattered on your shirt after a messy eating experience. Often heard as an accompaniment to "bugs on the windshield."

Wow, nice job eating, dude. Not only do you have bugs on the windshield but you've got turds on the hood too!

by Coop's Dad August 29, 2007

turd polishing

The act of trying to make something hopelessly weak and unattractive appear strong and appealing. An impossible process that usually results in a larger, uglier turd.

She tried to look more attractive by getting plastic surgery, but let's face it, you can't polish a turd.

by ktrane March 3, 2004

turd sculpture

The refined person’s way of referring to taking a shit.

Excuse me, my dear friend, I must leave for awhile so that I might work on a most collectible turd sculpture.

by Dr Bunnygirl June 5, 2021

turd-conscious

to be aware of fecal girth and volume when using a toilet. if a deposit of feces is too large for the plumbing in question, an early "courtesy flush" is definitely in order, sometimes in mid-loaf.

if one is properly turd-conscious, no plumbing disasters will occur.

i was visiting my in-laws when i had to take a huge dump. fortunately i am turd-conscious and employed a quick courtesy flush; therefore, averting an embarrassing need for a plunger... or even worse, an overflow of tainted water.

by phil condit April 22, 2003

bonus turd

When you make special effort to completely finish taking a dump because you only have enough toilet paper to wipe once, then just as you wipe your ass, you have to drop one more loaf.

Man, I used the last little bit of TP, and then along comes the bonus turd!

by Whiskey Drinker Me January 11, 2010

Tweety Turd

Another name for that pitiful excuse for a used douche president Donald Trump.

I see that Tweety Turd now wants to create a Space Force just so that he can waste more of OUR money. Your tax dollars at work here folks.

by Telephony August 11, 2018