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benjamin johnathan briggery briggs

benjamin johnathan briggery briggs aka "the skinwalker" , "boogalie" or simply "it", is a large, lankey, orange being known to roam around public parks and lithuanian embassys during the night trying to capture little boys to use in its experiments. it is known for being a test subject for heffley trafficking inc. its true form is believed to be so revolting, slimy, hideous, oily and dandruffy that anyone who comes into contact with it is simply too shocked and horrified to breath. for centuries there have been reported sightings of it and its lovers, xaviwavi, jamal and zac. in order to summon this ungodly creature the words "i cant do a pushup" , "i enjoy watching porn" or simply "we go jim" must be recited 3x and it is believed to show up immeadiatley and suck you through its phat hairy orange arsehole to the heffley trafficking inc dimension where you or your test subject will be experimented on. there are some well known repellants that have been used against it are: basic hygene, regular porn, hentai, women and people who are against crypto.
A- "bro there was some 8ft thingy hiding near that house!"
B- "oh fuck, be careful it may be benjamin johnathan briggery briggs"
by sharon6969420 November 20, 2022
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Oliver Johnathan Hymer

A larger creature commonly found roaming near maccas
by Oliver Hymer May 20, 2023
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Nefarious Johntarious

A verb describing something so downright ridiculous that it's warranted for an extended "Nefarious".
"Graduation is Kanye West's worst album."

"Oh naw bro that's actually Nefarious Johntarious."
by EnderThatGuy January 29, 2025
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Dirty johnathon

When your wrestling with someone you take off yours and there pants (consent or non) you put your dick into there mouth and finger there butt till they pass out. To make it more interesting throw up on the person to.
I was wrestling my cousin, and I gave her a dirty johnathon there was throw up everywhere
by Creziz February 13, 2025
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Going for a Johnathon

Going for a Johnathon is where you work on a night shift and skive off by going to the toilets for the sole purpose of playing with yourself
Back in a few, just Going for a Johnathon
by Nighter May 20, 2018
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