crusty bloomers

An unwashed pair of old ladies' knickers which have been worn for so long without changing them, they develop a layer of crust on the inside.

Edith struggled for half-an-hour or more to peel off her stinking crusty bloomers from around her mid-riff.

"That was worse than peeling gaffer tape off a foam mattress", she remarked.

by The Double Bass Adonis August 16, 2012

crusty hannah

A crusty hannah is when a girl grates the crust of her feet onto the males dick and then proceeds to give him a blowjob until he cums mixing the foot crust and cum together.

Boy: "Girl get over here and grate that crusty foot flake on my nob!!"

Girl: "I can't wait to give you a crusty hannah".

by Crusty Feet January 25, 2014

crusty wizard

When an elder male roleplays as a wizard and calls his penis a wand

"I heard my grandfather talking about something called a crusty wizard, dont ever search it up"

by Fucboi365 December 2, 2015

crusty glove

A sock previously used for masturbationthat is now hardened from dried cum

Ryan's mom found his crusty glove when she was doing laundry

by Mafrackincrackin October 15, 2015

Crusty Martha

As in Martha Stewart. A solo sex act that occurs at someone's house other than yours. When they aren't looking, you masturbate and then wipe your seed in their drapes.

While Jennifer was in the bathroom, I pulled a Crusty Martha on her new living room drapes.

by Tron Bobcat February 26, 2010

crusty bagpipe

When a chick with a tracheostomy is blowing you and she inhales right when you come and the spooge comes out her throat hole and dribbles on your nuts. It's a crusty bagpipe with tartar sauce if there's boogers in it.

That bitch gave me a crusty bagpipe and she didn't even lick my balls off after.

by analangus December 5, 2017

Crusty Muppet

A sock used by a male for masturbation.

My mom was shocked when she found my Crusty Muppet.

by RobsWorldIRL April 14, 2022