Masterbater

One, who feels the need to touch and feel upon himself/herself, in order to get sexual pleasure.
See: masterbate

The kid across the street is a damn masterbater, did you ever smell his hands?

by OneHungryHungryHippo May 4, 2004

masturbatory collateral

An unnecessary piece of printed material (often expensive and elaborate) created solely to inflate someone's corporate ego or impress business partners.

Frank: Did you see that $150K brochure Bob had made?
Bill: Yeah, it didn't even have any decent info in it.
Frank: Just another expensive piece of masturbatory collateral.

by Mirmaid Blue December 23, 2009

macsterbater

someone who uses their mac to repeadetly masterbate
sometiems using porn, sometimes not

Tom " Ed is such a macsterbater, he jacks off to his mac book pro all the time."

Mike" Yah i went over to his house yesterday and he wasn't even jacking off to any porn

by turmanjidurk May 18, 2010

masturbatorial

anything that makes you want to jerk the gerkin, rub the pole, choke the chicken, slap the salami, treat your body like a carnival, love yourself...

Nigclole Eggert was masturbatorial even before her stellor performance in "Blown Away" when was on "Charles In Charge."

by mc chocolate slushi November 11, 2003

Masterbational

Something sooooo totally badass that right at that moment you want to drop your pants and have a massive wank.

Star Trek was so masterbational that I wanked super hard right in the theatre and shot the screen with my dick cheese.

by BuGzeeYY June 14, 2009

Masterbatable

When a person empowers the qualities of such supreme attractiveness that simple thinking of them for just a moment causes your loins to tingle and burn.

This one particular gentleman I know is so masterbatable that thinking about him in any way makes my mind and my pantys a mess.

by Bogus24 August 26, 2017

status masterbation

A facebook, twitter, or other social media status update that serves only for the psychosocial gratification of the poster, not unlike sexual masterbation.

-Did you see Lisa's most recent facebook status update about how happy she is with her life and how thankful she is for everyone?

-Yeah, I did, and I can't stop reading it. I have such a fetish for reading status masterbation.

by andmybow February 20, 2014