Born a virgin birth because that's what Mary said. N**** came out with a phd. Wanted to rule the world. Enough said, they still do that in modern day. He did properly exist though.
by Intheflatfield December 24, 2023
Get the Jesus mug.Merry Christmas to all! I tell you a little about me.
I fucking loathe the Whore of Babylon Sarah for trying to steal Leon from me (I will never allow that in infinity years! Leon's is mines bitch!), but jokes on her, I got guns and U.S military experience. But anyways, I have fought in the Gulf War, Iraq and Afghanistan War, and have been stationed in many countries, including Germany, Japan, Guam, among many others. I have also met President Joe Biden and voted for him (still support Joe Biden btw).
I am a bisexual, but I have met my one true love, Leon. He is everything I want in a man, and makes me feel complete. I'm also Latina and my parents for some reason named me Jesus Christ, but hey, I love the name.
I'm a total butch girl and I like all things tough (I love my Ford F-250 truck!) and love America like no tomorrow. I also love guns and have quite a collection. I fight like nails! Black belts in all martial arts you can think of, and have some experience in Special Ops. I also lift bro.
I fucking loathe the Whore of Babylon Sarah for trying to steal Leon from me (I will never allow that in infinity years! Leon's is mines bitch!), but jokes on her, I got guns and U.S military experience. But anyways, I have fought in the Gulf War, Iraq and Afghanistan War, and have been stationed in many countries, including Germany, Japan, Guam, among many others. I have also met President Joe Biden and voted for him (still support Joe Biden btw).
I am a bisexual, but I have met my one true love, Leon. He is everything I want in a man, and makes me feel complete. I'm also Latina and my parents for some reason named me Jesus Christ, but hey, I love the name.
I'm a total butch girl and I like all things tough (I love my Ford F-250 truck!) and love America like no tomorrow. I also love guns and have quite a collection. I fight like nails! Black belts in all martial arts you can think of, and have some experience in Special Ops. I also lift bro.
"Why do you like Joe Biden Jesus?" - Some random friend
"Because he reminds me of my Dad!" - Female Jesus Christ
"Because he reminds me of my Dad!" - Female Jesus Christ
by JesusIsLeon'sGirlfriend December 24, 2023
Get the Jesus mug.A gateway band to sex and drugs. Jesus Wept will take your meds and your girl. Virgins and posers not welcome. Comfortably Dumb.
by HoggedOut69 December 25, 2023
Get the Jesus Wept mug.Hym "Yeah, no he IS Jesus Smuggling. He do be doing that. That's funny that you actually called him out for it. Even after the fact. It's so dishonest. By defining God thay way it implicit that the people who consider it an active and sentient being that has acted upon reality on several occasions by engaging in direct dialogue with key figures thought history. And he hates ME because his sophistry doesn't work on me."
by Hym Iam December 29, 2023
Get the Jesus Smuggling mug.Mostly known for her moodboards and sense of humor, she likes to give advice to dolls who are struggling to transition and she gives them tips on how to pass even if they don’t have access to hormones. She also likes to think of herself as Wendy Williams but if she was TS (transsexual) because she likes to update on what the dolls are doing and does the hot topic on twitter whenever something messy happens. She has a hatred for gay boys that use doll appropriation and calls them out for it. Although, she’s not a very famous doll page, her goal followers is to have 10k+ followers so she can made a broadcast on instagram for the dolls to see.
Doll 1: “Omg have you seen this doll page named Tranny Jesus? She’s so funny.”
Doll 2: “Yes, I love her. I literally pray to Tranny Jesus that in the future that i look fish while transitioning 🎀”
Doll 2: “Yes, I love her. I literally pray to Tranny Jesus that in the future that i look fish while transitioning 🎀”
by Tranny Jesus January 1, 2024
Get the Tranny Jesus mug.When a man is receiving oral, and just before he ejaculates, he pulls his member from her throat(or mouth) and nuts in her eye, similar to an Angry Pirate, but then shouts "May the Power of Christ Compel You!" And does the cross hand motions(head, genitals, left then right shoulders) and hits her with the V8 forehead palm-tap, causing her to stumble and fall backwards.
Janice thought she was about to swallow Tom's huge load, but instead found herself in a staredown with Dirty Pirate Jesus as Tom ran off maniacally giggling about "Exercising Hoe Demons"
by Captain Snackpack January 3, 2024
Get the Dirty Pirate Jesus mug.