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jesus

me, i'm very obviously jesus
Me: Hello
Everyone: Oh my god! It's literally Jesus Christ!
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Black Jesus

A cutaway gag from family guy that is way more funnier if you actually watch the clip
“I rode into town on an ass

Yo mama’s ass!”

-Black Jesus
by MUGlol69 October 10, 2021
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Jesus Loves You

A statement which you respond to by saying "IN THE ASS"! You can also initiate the conversation yourself by telling someone that Jesus loves them. After hesitating a bit, you can add the additional "IN THE ASS" part to the end of your statement.
by ANOTHERDEADROMEO April 29, 2023
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Jesus Burrito

1. a theoretical burrito that Jesus Christ makes so hot that even he himself cannot eat it (usually said to be microwaved).
2. any burrito that is so hot that it can't be eaten by a mortal human (although Jesus probably could).
3. A burrito that is so hot it makes you see Jesus.
4. Archaic: A burrito that is so hot that it burns the sin right outta ya.
5. Noun: Another name for the Holy Corpse Parts in Jojo's Bizzare Adventure, Specifically Eyes of Heaven, seeing as they look like burritos in the game
"Oh, we got another Jesus Burrito" - Joel
by Theawsomudkip December 7, 2020
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Jesus

Son of God, loves endlessly, died for our sins. always forgiving.
john 3:16
i’m sorry for being such a jerk.”
“it’s ok, i forgive you and Jesus does too.”
by lovedbytheSonofGod October 1, 2022
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Jetway Jesus

A mythical figure colloquially known in the airline industry believed to miraculously 'heal' passengers who request wheelchairs or any other form of mobility assistance at their point of departure but mysteriously no longer need it upon their arrival. The sudden recovery is often attributed to the miraculous intervention of 'Jetway Jesus'. The term reflects the cynical humor often employed by airline employees due to the perceived misuse of accessibility services by able-bodied passengers.
After helping a passenger in a wheelchair onto the plane, I was surprised to see her walk off unassisted at the destination. Looks like we've had another visit from Jetway Jesus.
by HappyCleaner82 November 21, 2023
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jesus blinker

by anonymous May 9, 2021
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