bearded wanker

When a bloke is more obsessed with his beard than fucking everything

I love playing with my beard it proper turns me on. I think I'm a bearded wanker

by Bearded wanker March 14, 2016

Wanker-in-chief

The supreme leader of a group of wankers.

Usually used to refer to a useless politician.

"I hereby declare you, Wanker-in-chief"

by Titan90 September 01, 2019

Cheese Wanker

Someone who fancies themselves to be a cheese expert and can't stop talking about cheese.

He's such a cheese wanker! Every time we eat cheese, he can't stop talking. I just want to eat the damn cheese. I don't need to hear about how it was made, what the cow was fed and how many times a week the cheesemaker brushed the cheese!

by TheCheeseWanker April 14, 2022

Word Wanker

Someone proficient in manipulating language to express complex thoughts in a simple way

"Wow Laura managed to fit such a complex thought into only ONE tweet?! I'd need a whole thread! She's such a word wanker."

by laura898 November 27, 2020

wanker's tan

Pasty complexion sported by young men who spend far too much time alone in the bedroom with the curtains pulled shut.

'I've just got grand theft auto san andreas for christmas, so i'll be spending the next few months working on my wanker's tan.'

by Chuckle Mother February 22, 2005

Briefcase Wanker

An insult commonly used against those who carry briefcases.

Bully: Look at that briefcase wanker!
Briefcase Wanker: Fuck off, faggot!

by badboyCHANCE October 24, 2010

hefty wanker

A 12 year old swag fag who vapes all the time and jacks off 2 times a day.

I saw John vaping yesterday and he said he just got done jacking off. What a hefty wanker.

by ButterboyOG August 22, 2015