by yung ass rupturer July 31, 2021
Get the touhou themed blow jobmug. Have you even been getting head and the girl blowing you has looked up and asked “are you almost there yet?” all the while your thinking “you just started 5 minutes ago?” only to look at the clock and see an hour has passed?
This is not simply a matter of “time fly’s by when you’re having a good time”. There is a relatively simple mathematical explanation for this that also answers why some 20 year old girls look like they are in their 40s.
1. Firstly understand that like matter, time cannot be created or destroyed.
We can start by giving a Blow Job a scalar quantity to help mathematically differentiate a good blow job and bad blow job.
2. The Scalars are as follows; 0.1 – 1.9
0.1 being the absolute best possible blow job
3. The BJ/Time Equation: BJ*T= TAm
BJ= Blow Job scalar (as discussed above)
T= Real time passed
TAm= Time aged, male
Example: Your receive a decently good blow job at an estimated scalar quantity of 0.7 for sixty minutes
0.7*60= 42
Meaning that in sixty minutes of receiving head you have only aged 42 minutes, however as aforementioned time cannot be created or destroyed so the 18 minutes you lost in that hour are carried over to the girl blowing you.
So in sixty minutes of her blowing you she’s aged 78 minutes.
This explains why some women in their 20’s look like they’re in their 40’s ; they’ve given tonnes of amazing blow jobs over the past 20 years of her life, thus aging them significantly.
This is not simply a matter of “time fly’s by when you’re having a good time”. There is a relatively simple mathematical explanation for this that also answers why some 20 year old girls look like they are in their 40s.
1. Firstly understand that like matter, time cannot be created or destroyed.
We can start by giving a Blow Job a scalar quantity to help mathematically differentiate a good blow job and bad blow job.
2. The Scalars are as follows; 0.1 – 1.9
0.1 being the absolute best possible blow job
3. The BJ/Time Equation: BJ*T= TAm
BJ= Blow Job scalar (as discussed above)
T= Real time passed
TAm= Time aged, male
Example: Your receive a decently good blow job at an estimated scalar quantity of 0.7 for sixty minutes
0.7*60= 42
Meaning that in sixty minutes of receiving head you have only aged 42 minutes, however as aforementioned time cannot be created or destroyed so the 18 minutes you lost in that hour are carried over to the girl blowing you.
So in sixty minutes of her blowing you she’s aged 78 minutes.
This explains why some women in their 20’s look like they’re in their 40’s ; they’ve given tonnes of amazing blow jobs over the past 20 years of her life, thus aging them significantly.
Dude 1: Dude you look wicked youthful
Dude 2: Yeah Jessica must have blown me back 2 years in this week alone
Dude 1: Aw yeah, Jessica loves giving sucking dick and it really shows. She amazing at it.
Dude 2: Yeah, its a ashame she looks like shes 84 though.
Dude 1: well i guess those are just the dynamics of blow job physics
Dude 2: Yeah Jessica must have blown me back 2 years in this week alone
Dude 1: Aw yeah, Jessica loves giving sucking dick and it really shows. She amazing at it.
Dude 2: Yeah, its a ashame she looks like shes 84 though.
Dude 1: well i guess those are just the dynamics of blow job physics
by Sandduneman January 27, 2011
Get the The Dynamics of Blow Job Physicsmug. The incredible ability most New England girls have to give a fucking great bj, often due to the attention they give your balls beforehand. This is believed to be the result of the Irish influence in New England, because they enjoy this sort of attention.
Abbv: NEBJ
Abbv: NEBJ
by E-$$ January 11, 2008
Get the New England Blow Jobmug. by Akir April 7, 2014
Get the 90's blow jobmug. noun; n: a particular fashion of blowjob that requires the blower to be high out of her proverbial mind. She/he must be so high as to have the symptom: kottonmouth, with said kottonmouth he/she must blow the blowie.
brosef: bro, i got me a kotton mouth blow job!
brohan: bro, no way that's dope!
brosef: I KNOW, RIGHT!
brohan: bro, no way that's dope!
brosef: I KNOW, RIGHT!
by spock182 April 26, 2010
Get the Kotton Mouth Blow Jobmug. The FBJ or Forced Blow Job, is the process of two Beer bottles colliding bottom to head causing a reaction that sends white frothy liquid spurting from the shaft of the victims drink. This then forces the drinker to shove the neck of the bottle into their mouth, in an attempt to prevent liquid from coating the surrounding area in foamy white residue. An accurate execution of The FBJ being performed takes skilled precision and timing. The key is to ensure that the rear end of the initiators bottle meets both with enough force and impact against the pinnacle of the victim’s bottle to cause the most severe reaction.
Imagine someone shoving the steam of a beer bottle into their mouth in an aggressive yet pleasurable motion similar to the act of providing oral sex to a man's genitals. Then finally imagine the hilarity as someone tries to contain the foamy residue of the of the bottles orgasmic reaction from flying from their mouth and onto their recently polished leather shoes. Then my friends, you have witnessed a metaphysical FBJ (Forced Blow Job). As a witness, your reaction should sound similar to: “HA! You just got a sneaky FBJ! Classic!” or “You just got FBJ’d!”
by A Communion of Willi's December 26, 2011
Get the FBJ (Forced Blow Job)mug. A day celebrated on March 14. On which the woman in a relationship is supposed to give the man a blow job after making a steak dinner.
Woman-"What's today's date?"
Man-"Steak and a blow job day! March 14,! Hooray!!!!!! I'm a carnivore with sexual needs and desires!"
Man-"Steak and a blow job day! March 14,! Hooray!!!!!! I'm a carnivore with sexual needs and desires!"
by carpediem December 14, 2008
Get the steak and a blow job daymug.