Houston Astros

The Houston Astros are a Major League Baseball team based in Houston, Texas. They are in the American League West Division but were previously in the National League Central Division.

Founded: 1962 (National League expansion)
Formerly known as: Houston Colt .45s (1962-1964). The team changed its name to the Astros when it began playing in the Astrodome in 1965.
Home ballpark: Minute Maid Park, Houston (formerly known as Astros Field and Enron Field)
Former ballparks: Colt Stadium, Houston Astrodome
Uniform colors: Orange and blue
Logo design: Orange star with a white H on the cap and the word "Astros" on the jersey in a block font

(Note: All achievements before 2012 were in the National League, all achievements 2013 and later were in the American League)
Wild Card titles won (4): 2004, 2005, 2015, 2020
Division titles won (13): 1980, 1981, 1986, 1997, 1998, 1999, 2001, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2021, 2022, 2023
Pennants won (5): 2005, 2017, 2019, 2021, 2022
World Series championships won (2): 2017, 2022
Retired numbers: 5, 7, 24, 25, 32, 33, 34, 40, 49, 42
Hall of Fame inductees: Craig Biggio, Jeff Bagwell, Nolan Ryan, Joe Morgan, Randy Johnson, Iván Rodríguez, Don Sutton, Nellie Fox, Leo Durocher, Eddie Mathews, Robin Roberts
Main Rivals: Los Angeles Dodgers, New York Yankees, Texas Rangers, Atlanta Braves, Washington Nationals
Historical Rivalries: St. Louis Cardinals, Chicago Cubs
(This is an updated version of the definition made by CubbiesSwallow in 2005)
The Houston Astros own the New York Yankees in the playoffs!
by CJP64 February 21, 2024
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houston hammer

when in texas you analy fuck your bitch, then you cum in her eyeballs, causing her puss puss to spread wide open and scream spank me daddy.
damn that houston hammer sesh was unbearable last night.
by Sir. Faggot September 16, 2017
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Houston Hotpot

Get some gerbils, peanut butter, a Morningstar, saran wrap, a car battery, and a shit ton of electrical wire. Sit on one, insert another orally then rush to connect the wires to the battery while spinning to cover up completely with cellulose wrap.
Phil thinks he's getting wierd this weekend, but only reinvented the Houston Hotpot
by Estebe January 17, 2025
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peter houston

a loving man who cares for anyone he encounters.
wow I just met this girl and she 's so nice, she's a peter Houston.
by brandyteddy November 23, 2016
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Houston Hotbox

The act of getting killed by the smoke/chemical fumes of a industrial accident. Named for the multitude of industrial accidents that have occurred in the area around Houston, Texas.
Person 1: My man got Houston Hotboxed in that plant fire
Person 2: And that's why a house next to a chemical plant is a bad idea
by inhaleball April 08, 2021
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Houston Blackface

When you take a shit on a bald lady’s head and rub it into her face.
“Hey did you take part in the houston blackface last week?”
by NotAFruitSalad May 31, 2022
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houston lemonade

The act of a person peeing in one's mouth then the person with the piss in their mouth spits the piss in the other person's asshole and uses it as lube.
Me and my girlfriend did a houston lemonade last night, so wet!!!!
by Houston lemonade May 06, 2024
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