Don't Come To School Tomorrow

What the quiet kid who think's he is the main character tells kids and "attempts" to become a school shooter tomorrow.

Hunter: Don't come to school tomorrow.
John: Oh my god, you're not the fucking main character.

by jeffthebalkan April 12, 2024

Belief in God is WHATEVER I DO AND NOT THE THING I DON'T DO

No it isn't Jordan! No it isn't! This is You trying to reframe what constitutes belief to justify taking all of that Christian money. To believe in THE CHRISTIAN GOD is to believe that THE THINGS IN THE BOOK DID, ARE, AND WILL HAPPEN, Jordan. Is the Christian God THERE Jordan. Is it THERE and does it have the attributes it is depicted to have in the bible OR.... OR... IS IT NOT THERE, Jordan? Is that A THING THAT YOU THINK? DO YOU THINK THAT THE CREATURE IS THERE? IS THAT A THING YOU THINK OR DO YOU NOT THINK THAT? ARE YOU A BOY OR ARE YOU A GIRL, JORDAN?

Dr. JeepJorp Peepeestones "Belief in God is WHATEVER I DO AND NOT THE THING I DON'T DO! Ok!? So if I don't actually believe in God, then, actually believing in God isn't actually believing in God, OK!? Believing in God is something else entirely! Now... Ok!? You can't just ACTUALLY BELIEVE that God is THERE... You gotta... You gotta, like, grapple with the IDEA that it MIGHT be there! And then you gotta interpret the book so that WHATEVER YOU DO... Is doing the Book! Even if you contradict yourself AND THE BOOK! Right!? See, God (and by extension all higher-order abstractions) is whatever I need to do be, moment to moment, for me to maintain a certain level of moral superiority. So, maturity? Whatever I need it to be, moment to moment. Belief? Whatever I need it to be, moment to moment? God? You got it! Whatever I need it to be, moment to moment."

by Hym Iam May 21, 2024

"Don't reward bad behavior" ~ Dr. Phil

Instead... Lock them up at the Dr. Phil rape farm and then your staff can rape the bad behavior out of them. Controlling people's behavior is SUPER important because women are vulnerable to psychogenic epidemics! Like the "hysteria" epidemic! Remember that? Remember how women were just labeled with "hysteria" and you could just lock em up? The was cool and Dr. Phil is totally fine with and has actively done a thing that was directly conceptually adjacent to that.

"Don't reward bad behavior" ~ Dr. Phil

Hym "Yes. Instead... Do whatever it takes to control their behavior upto and including locking them up against their will without them committing a crime and with their parent's consent... And then rape them repeatedly. That's Dr. Phil's solution to bad behavior and I think we should all remember that."

by Hym Iam March 12, 2024

Mama don't worry by Bhad Bhabie? Look naive enough?

Mama don't worry by Bhad Bhabie? Look naive enough?

Mama don't worry by Bhad Bhabie? Look naive enough?

by Kmqq April 21, 2023

Your boat don't float

Something that has weighed it down... Not on surface but below or underneath the surface... An anchor may cause a boat not to float... Therefore it it stuck..

Your boat don't float if you don't have any ambitions

by anonymous March 11, 2021

Don't know the meaning of the word

behave as if unaware of the concept referred to or implied.

"“Humanity?” You don't know the meaning of the word!"

by Arminkshipper May 19, 2025

No! You really, really don't (he says blubbering) 😭

HA! I TOLD YOU YOU'D SAY IT YOU BLUBBERING FRAUD! HAHAHA! YOU'RE NOT MORE IMPORTANT THAN EVERYONE FOR HAVING A KID! THE INFLATED VALUE OF YOUR KID'S LIFE ONLY EXISTS IN RELATIONSHIP TO POSITIVE ASSOCIATION SHARED BETWEEN PARENT AND CHILD AND PARENTS ABUSE THEIR KIDS OR DISOWN THEM FOR BEING GAY OR ABANDON THEM ALL THE TIME!

A Charlatan "No! You really, really don't (he says blubbering) 😭"

Hym "HA! He said the thing! Well... He got his plant to do it but you see? No. Fuck your kids. Your parental narcissism is a cancer and your affection for them is entirely dependent on their willingness to live in accordance with your values."

by Hym Iam March 28, 2024