Broods Before Dudes

An unwritten yet powerful law governing the lifestyle choices of domesticated adult males. The law automatically goes into effect following the appearance of the first offspring and it immediately supercedes the "Bros Before Hoes" ordinance (if said regulation has not already been ruled unconstitutional by the ranking female domestic partner). The law is often invoked by disapproving mother-in-laws, with a chiding tone of voice and the words "family first" (and sometimes accompanied by a finger wag).

Depending on tribal customs and which side of the bed local authorities got up on, the law may dramatically reduce or outright prohibit a broad variety of activities including: shooting hoops, watching the game, fishing trips, gaming binges, nights out with the boys, poker nights, ultra violent action movie nights, getting drunk and ogling women way out of your league nights... The list goes on.

The true impact of the law is felt not just by the adult male (i.e. "father"), but also indirectly by the man's best bros, extended friends, co-workers, and the many merchants and facilitators that typically service "the boys" when they go out. In recent years many (men) have cited the negative impact of the law on local economies but, unlike the exhaustive research behind the "Bros Before Hoes" legislation, those subject to "Broods Before Dudes" are generally to exhausted by the end of the day to argue, much less do an economic impact analysis.

See also: bros before hoes

Friend 1: Bro, you down with beers this Friday?
Friend 2: (to self, recalling the face of his infant child staring up at him) ...broods before dudes...
Friend 1: (recognizing the blank stare) Never mind, man. You've got stuff going on... How is Dancing With The Stars these days?

by JasonYH September 17, 2012

work before twerk

Meaning a lady has to get her work done before the freak can get her twerk on

Bro: "Hey girl, ya wanna meet at the club?"
Ho: "I'm a boss bitch and need to finish up some deliverables this evening, maybe next time."
Bro: "Ah, work before twerk. Get it girl."
Ho: "Gotta make that coin!"

by GlazeHer July 5, 2015

i before e except after c except when

I before e except after c except when your foreign neighbor Keith received eight counterfeit beige sleighs from feisty caffeinated weightlifters. Weird.

I before e except after c except when... this is what they taught you in the third grade math instead of how to pay taxes or something.

by StarPrismGaming April 4, 2021

Kissing homie before sleep

Kissing homie before sleep is not gay. Its act of kindnes and friendship.

Homie 1: I am Kissing homie before sleep
Homie 2: Yo nigga that is gay as fuck
Homie 1: No it is not

by Fritovane Hranolečky December 9, 2020

Baffoon

A moron who has seen the definition of "bafoon" and thinks he is smart enough to spell it correctly, but still is too fucking stupid to look up how to spell it

Idiot: "wow people who can't spell baffoon are so stupid! like seriously, who would be that dumb?"
Smart person: "you fucking idiot..."

by kylorendud July 23, 2020

Pussies before wussies

The response to guys when they quote the "Bros before hoes" line.

Steve said he couldn't hang out with me on Friday because he already made plans with the guys and then told me "bros before hoes" so I made plans with the girls and told him "pussies before wussies."

by Bobcat_Grl April 12, 2011

beffen

Dutch word for eating pussy

Damn man, I can't wait to bef her!

by J April 22, 2004