pinched a loaf

Pinching a loaf refers to when one's sphincter clenches up mid-bowel movement, and cuts the egressing turd in half. The result is usually that one will have to wipe oneself raw in an effort to return one's rectum to a pristine un-befouled state of cleanliness.

Wife: Honey, what's taking you so long. We're going to be late.

Husband: I pinched a loaf, dear. Now I'll have to take another shower.

Wife: Oh, the humanity! I'll see if I can push back our reservations.

by Hoopermazing September 08, 2006

Pinching a loaf

Or to pinch a loaf - having a shit

1. yo bitch get my dinner ready, i'm gonna go pinch a loaf
2. i wouldn't go in there for 35-40 minutes, some bastards' pinched a loaf

by Bob April 06, 2004

Pinch-A-Loaf

The act of dispursing poo out of the anus. Slang terms include: pinch a mean one, dropping the kids off at the pool, taking the browns to the super bowl, taking a dump, lose some poundage, drop a load, etc.

Hey man, I really gotta Pinch-A-Loaf, can I use your bathroom?

by Monnor Cunn July 20, 2010

"Pinch a loaf"

To extrude an exceptionally massive terd.

If the boss is wondering where I am, please tell him that I had to "pinch a loaf".

by Larry Latrino July 21, 2006

Pinch a loaf

To cut off the hanging of fecal matter from the anus.

Hey dog I'll be ready in a few, I gotta pinch a loaf first.

by Danielwebster February 22, 2015

Pinch the loaf

One who is in a hurry to take shit, so they are forced to pinch it off, before they are finished. It usually leads to an uncomfortable feeling in someone's ass.

Man, my ass is killing me because I had to pinch the loaf while at that party.

by Ultimate Brad November 17, 2009

Pinch a loaf

1)To shit.
2)To irritate or surprise.

1) I gotta go pinch a loaf.
2)That just pinches my loaf!

by maclaird January 19, 2009