The mathematical process by which one or a group measures the quality and size of their shits. A way to compare shits between competing friends/enemies. There is an average shit for humanity, as taken by Jesus Christ unto St. Peter's face (the Holy Shit), and shits greater than or less than the Holy Shit is measured by standard deviation in terms of chippermonkeys. Shitistics apply to size, girth, smell, denisty, color, and toilet clogging ability. Shitistics are measured by a neutral arbiter in a "who took the biggest shit" dispute.
Jason: Shit dude, I took a huge shit this morning.
Matt: What are the shitistics you shithead?
Jason: Size: 1.2 chippermonkeys, Girth: 3.8 chippermonkeys, Smell: 2.8 chippermonkeys, Density: -1.9 chippermonkeys, Color: 0.2 chippermonkeys, Toilet Clogging: 10.0 chippermonkeys.
Matt: I guess thats a decent shit.
Jason: Shit, I had to buy new socks.
Matt: Tell Craig to come measure the shitistics on the deuce I just dropped.
Matt: What are the shitistics you shithead?
Jason: Size: 1.2 chippermonkeys, Girth: 3.8 chippermonkeys, Smell: 2.8 chippermonkeys, Density: -1.9 chippermonkeys, Color: 0.2 chippermonkeys, Toilet Clogging: 10.0 chippermonkeys.
Matt: I guess thats a decent shit.
Jason: Shit, I had to buy new socks.
Matt: Tell Craig to come measure the shitistics on the deuce I just dropped.
by Cream Puff69 October 13, 2012
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Geo's and JBZ's jokes about Tony are the Switist.
The Switist people use the word swite.
Geo's and JBZ's jokes about Tony are the Switist.
The Switist people use the word swite.
by JBZ December 10, 2004
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SBitis
• shitism
• Shitistic
• SBITS
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• switist
• Shitisarus
• Shitisfied
• shitislesticks
• shitispiss
This restaurant only caters to suitists.
by suitison April 4, 2017
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It's a combination of having the shits and the itis. You go out, eat big meal from a questionable buffet and spend the rest of the day either crapping your pants or falling asleep, or worse, both simultaneously.
It's a combination of having the shits and the itis. You go out, eat big meal from a questionable buffet and spend the rest of the day either crapping your pants or falling asleep, or worse, both simultaneously.
Gary: Hey Pete, you ain't looking good.
Pete: Ug, I ate at Number 1 Super Indian Buffet for lunch. Now I got the Shitis.
Gary: The what?
Pete: the Shitis. I keep falling asleep whenever I'm not pooping my brains out.
Gary: Shitty.
Pete: Ug, I ate at Number 1 Super Indian Buffet for lunch. Now I got the Shitis.
Gary: The what?
Pete: the Shitis. I keep falling asleep whenever I'm not pooping my brains out.
Gary: Shitty.
by J-Roc n friends November 26, 2010
Get the The Shitis mug.pseudo crap, stuff that is almost shitty, a situation where the involved parties of a conflict get screwed over.
by mikEy07 October 5, 2006
Get the Shitish mug.An induced delusional state of mind where magic words and phrases, like "Great Deal Soon," "FANTASTIC!" "tremendous," "MOAR Tarrifs," elicit a desired effect, leading to zombism and constipation. There is no know cure.
The stock market under Trump is full of so much shitism that sunshine isn't even blowing out his ass!
by CABG Patch March 1, 2019
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