Noun. The state in which a man is too intoxicated to erect his penis. Also known as a very severe case of whisky dick.
Austin: "Hey man, you seemed way too drunk to function last night...did you hook up with that deaf girl?"
Will: "Oh I had no chance of getting it up, but you better believe I still fucked some sounds out of her with my flacid pedro anyways!!!"
Will: "Oh I had no chance of getting it up, but you better believe I still fucked some sounds out of her with my flacid pedro anyways!!!"
by phillyyy March 06, 2011

My tee shot landed about a flacid cocksworth from the hole.
I have about a flacid cocksworth of milk left in my glass
I have about a flacid cocksworth of milk left in my glass
by theshopkeeper October 29, 2010

by BernieG95 January 21, 2018

When the porn or any other source of sexual pleasure isn't hot enough to give you a boner and your penis is flacid like a flap jack, but you still rub one off anyways.
"I was watching tub girl last night, but she didn't do it for me so I pulled a flacid jack just for the heck of it."
by DjDM May 20, 2009

by Gay Lord Lemy winkle You. The riduclously gay bear February 24, 2006

by veryboredperson May 15, 2022

When your dong is suddenly gone because you were trying to have sex with your sister then your girlfriend walked in. (That word is only a valid word in cases exactly like this)
I was tryna fuck my sister, but bae walked in and my dick got scared so it let out a loud shout saying "INSTANT FLACIDITY!!!" Which of course activated the power to retract immediately so as to flee a dangerous situation
by YouDontKnoMe_ September 10, 2019
