Cornish Army

The Cornish Army was first used in combat in 1497, during the Cornish Rebellion. A blacksmith and a lawyer managed to raise an army of 15,000 men and marched into Devon, conquering it, relatively unopposed. Wells, Winchester, Bristol, and Salisbury were taken, though while in Taunton they suffered a slight hiccup when a tax commissioner was murdered, but apart from this one incedent the march was referred to as, 'without any slaughter, violence or spoil of the country'. They tried to rally the 'volatile men of Kent*' to their cause, but the Kentishmen had decided that what was going on was too far away to concern them. This disheartened a number of the Cornish troops, who decided to call it quits and went home. The remainder of the forces decided to take on the King (Henry VII). They arrived at Guildford and awaited the retaliation of the Crown. They were attacked by a meager force of 500 mounted spearmen, which they promptly defeated. The Cornish army then moved in on London and the Royal Family barricaded themselves in the Tower of London, whilst the rest of the city began to panic. At Blackheath the Cornish set up their final camp and prepared for 'The Battle Of Deptford Bridge' (located in south-east London).
The Cornish army had by this point around 12,000 troops, while the King had a whooping 25,000. The battle lasted about half a day and ended with the defeat of the Cornish.
Wouldn't it have been interesting if they had won?

*Home of the Peasants' Revolt of 1381.

The Cornish Army was quite cool... for the 15th Century.

by Emperor Francis I December 9, 2008

The Katelyn Corkscrew

A sexual act where you experience maximum penis power. Put 7 dicks in each ear, 2 in each nostril, and one huge one in the mouth, and you're set!

Hey babe~ You wanna try the Katelyn Corkscrew tonight~? I know some people that'll help make it happen~

by Furret walk of Justice April 4, 2019

cornischlong

a large penis.

the opposite of a pickle dick.

combines the words cornichon (french for gerkin) and schlong.

dave: "i heard todd has the smallest pickle dick"

eric: "nah no way, it must have been cold. i saw a movie he made, it was definately a cornischlong"

by staygold1984 March 18, 2010

Commack Corkscrew

Putting a 100 calorie twinkie into your anus and having a small asian child suck out the cream.

Jamaal Jamaalson: "Yo dawg wat you be up to tonight"
Chun-Hing Choy: "I go Commack Corkscrew your mother tonight!"

by Frenchie Ventimiglia June 3, 2009

Cornism

Cornism is a incredible religion of following corn. Now you may ask, but why would people worship corn ? That doesnt make any sense! Well there are obvious reasons for this. Corn has many uses, such as; corn silk, corn glue, corn meal, corn pencilin, corn syrup, corn grain, and corn ethanol. And even more are being made! We owe many things to corn, and we havent given corn the respect it deserves. There are 1000+ uses, but still no one seems to care. We are here to change that. Convert to Cornism today.

Dave: Hey man, have you converted to Cornism yet?

Kyle: What? Of course! All should convert to Cornism!

by Taznixx September 26, 2018

cornswaggle

to scam someone with little or no thought into the scam

i tried to cornswaggle my mom into letting me have some money she told me to get a job.

by Jesse Castillo June 12, 2007

Cornswoggle

To break something completely beyond repair. Usually something you didn't think was possible to break in the first place. Ex. Nokia, power steering, Titanic.

He cornswoggled his power steering by turning too hard and snapped it.

by Burkns March 21, 2015